Curiosity Killed the Cat
by Mizzytron
Summary: Naruto suddenly falls ill.Kakashi knows more than he is telling.What happens when Sasuke gets a little too curious? YAOI SasuNaru KakaIru DISCONTINUED
1. Whispers

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Disclaimer:** Nope, don't own it.

**Summary: **Naruto suddenly falls ill. Kakashi knows more than he is telling. What happens when Sasuke gets a little too curious?

**Pairings: **SasuNaru, possible KakaIru.

**Warning:** This fic contains yaoi. (Guy on guy love) If the sexual acts of two men bother you in anyway, then I suggest you stop reading now. I don't want to have to deal with flaming.

**A/N: **Hiya! LB here! Whoo, it's my first fic posting ever! So, all comments and/or critiques are welcomed greatly. I just ask you to please be gentle, I bruise easily. (I told you it was my first post ever) So, I just want to know what you think about it, and (blah blah blah, etc.)

**Kakashi:** Just shut up and let them read the story!

**LB:** Kashi-kun, you're so mean! T.T

**

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Chapter 1

"Whispers"

"Naruto, you won't get anywhere by attacking directly." Kakashi warned, rolling his eyes. But his words fell deaf upon the blonde, who was only interested in beating the shit out of the pale-skinned nin in front of him.

Needless to say, he was failing miserably.

The pale enemy was holding his own effortlessly, as if mocking the attacker's attempts. This only drove the dobe faster, harder, (LB: Oh how wrong that sounds…) expending the limits of his chakra.

"Naruto, stop! You'll-" Kakashi ordered, but he was too late. Naruto had used up all of his energy, and consequently collapsed. The pale nin he was fighting backed off slowly, reverting back to his bored superior look.

Sakura shrieked and ran to her fallen teammate. She poked his unmoving body.

"Naruto? Naaaaaaaruuuuuuuutoooooooo!" she yelled into his ear.

"He's faking." A cold voice came from Uchiha Sasuke, the ninja who had beaten the dobe. Kakashi's attention had wandered to his book again.

Fed up with his teammate's pity fainting, Sasuke threw a punch at the blonde's head. He (He being Naruto) jerked his head away, and started writhing in pain on the ground.

"You're not fooling us, Naruto!" Sakura yelled, making Kakashi's attention break away from his porn book. He took one glance at the scene in front of him and his visible eye widened considerably.

"Sasuke! Sakura! Step away from him!" he barked sharply. He walked up to the blonde, picking him up off the hard ground like a rag doll. He then ran by rooftop with his other two students diligently following him.

"Kakashi-sensei, where are we going?" Sakura asked.

"To the hospital." Came the grim reply.

"Why? What's happening?"

Suddenly Kakashi stopped and looked at the other two in the eyes, calculating what to say. He sighed.

"There are things about Naruto that you don't know."

"…Like…?"

"It's…not fit for me to say. Not in public, at least."

"What?"

"I am forbidden to tell anyone. Ask Naruto once he heals. If he wants you to know, then he will tell you. But don't bug him about it. Understood?"

"Hai."

"Right."

And with that, off to Tsunade's they went.

**

* * *

**

(Late night, the same day)

Sasuke was home at his manor. But his head was swarming with unanswered questions.

_'What's wrong with Naruto? Why did everyone look so grim? Why can't Kakashi talk about it? What is he hiding?'_

Sasuke slammed his fist into the wall. He stood there, trembling with fury, until a disturbing thought entered his head.

'_What if it's my fault?'_

The Uchiha sat down slowly, burying his face in his hands. He sincerely hoped Naruto falling ill had nothing to do with him. But something in the back of his head was accusing him of hurting the blonde. I mean, he was the one Naruto was fighting with right before he collapsed!

'_That's it. I have to find out!'_ he thought. He was determined to find the source of Naruto's illness, and prove it wasn't him.

And once Uchiha's are determined to do something, they don't give up easily.

He rushed out the front door in a flash, almost barreling into Sakura, who was still building up courage to knock. Sasuke skidded to a halt, but instead, falling over face down.

"Sakura!" he gasped through the concrete, thoroughly exasperated.

"Where are you going in such a hurry, Sasuke-kun?"

"Why are you at my house?"

"Good point."

"What do you want?"

"W-well, I couldn't stop thinking about Naruto, b-but I'm sc-scared to go to Ts-Tsunade's al-alone!" she spluttered, stuttering, and blushing in a Hinata-like manner.

"Good. Come on." Sasuke said, grabbing her by the arm, and dragging her along. Unfortunately, Sakura was too caught up in the gusto of the moment to realize the love of her life was touching her.

**

* * *

**

They were almost there. Sasuke had let go of his teammate's arm long ago, much to the kunoichi's disappointment. Sasuke's eyebrow raised, his dark eyes following a certain silver-haired Jounin sneaking in through an upstairs window.

_'Finally, some answers.'_ Sasuke thought with a sly smirk, creeping in the same route his sensei took, a pink-haired nin in tow. They froze in the hallway when they started to hear voices.

Backs pressed against the wall, they strained to listen what was being said in Naruto's room.

**

* * *

**

Kakashi strolled into his student's room casually, but he was surprised greatly when he saw a familiar face.

A brown pony tailed, tan-skinned chuunin was already by Naruto's bedside.

"Umino-san." Kakashi nodded coolly, trying to look as controlled as possible. But damn was self-control hard when being around THAT teacher. Iruka looked up, also surprised.

"Hatake-san."

"Why are you out so late?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

"Well, he is my student." Kakashi retorted, stressing the word 'my'. Iruka flinched. After a beat,

"What's wrong with him?" he whispered in a pained voice. Kakashi chuckled. He swung an arm over Iruka's shoulder playfully. The chuunin blushed a bright red and turned his head away. This made Kakashi grin even wider.

"He'll be okay. He's no danger…to us, anyway."

Iruka looked confused.

"But, Sasuke can defend himself easily. Much better than Na-"

"No. I'm not talking about that."

Iruka got an even more confused look.

"Honestly, Iruka. You were their teacher. Didn't you see?" Kakashi leaned in closer to whisper in Iruka's ear.

"Sasuke may not realize it, but he and Naruto are closer than they think."

Suddenly it dawned on the pony tailed nin.

"I get what you're saying, Kakashi, but why do you have to whisper?" he asked.

"Because," Kakashi said, glancing over to the door.

"We have guests."

**TBC

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**LB: Whoo cliffy! Ok, I know the chapter was kind of short. It was a whole lot longer on paper, I swear! But I wasn't going to combine any chapters now, that would totally ruin the awesome cliffhanger-ness! So R&R everyone, and I won't have to go on an emo streak!**

**Kakashi: Please comment. For your sanity and mine.**

**Sasuke enters in**

**Sasuke: Wait! Since when do I love Naruto? He's a dead body in a hospital bed!**

**LB: covers Sasuke's mouth Shh! Because I said so! And no, Naruto is not dead! assures readers I have no intention of killing off Naru-chan, ok? Don't listen to Sasuke!**

**Naruto pokes head in**

**Naruto: What's this about killing me?**

**LB: Uhh… throws Sasuke, Naruto, and Iruka plushies at the cast and runs away, screaming something about potatoes**


	2. Behind Closed Doors

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to the almighty Kishimoto. Not me!

**Warning: **This chapter has lemonish parts to it. Skip it if you have something against it.

**A/N: **First off, I want to say a BIG arigato to you guys who reviewed me! You made my day a whole lot happier! Which inspired me to write this thing so early. Second of all, the story is set in before the Chuunin Exams, but after the fight with Zabuza and Haku. Thirdly, I need a Beta. I don't make a lot of spelling errors, but I would like one just in case. If interested, e-mail me at You might have to explain stuff to me; I'm a little naïve here. All right, enjoy the Chapter Two!

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**Chapter 1 recap**

"I get what you're saying, Kakashi, but why do we have to whisper?" Iruka asked.

"Because," Kakashi said, glancing over to the door.

"We have guests."

* * *

**Chapter 2**

"Behind Closed Doors"

Sasuke and Sakura gasped. Sasuke's heart was beating rapidly. They had heard the frightening announcement made by their teacher.

'_Dammit, how does he know we're here?' _Sasuke's mind raced. He looked around for a shadow, a sound, anything! He shut his eyes tightly, preparing for the wrath of Kakashi.

But nothing came.

* * *

"Why aren't you chasing them off?" Iruka asked.

"He'll find out sooner or later." Kakashi shrugged.

"…You still haven't told me what's wrong with Naruto."

"Well, you know how he's a vessel for the Kyuubi…"

"Yes."

"And it _is_ springtime."

"Hai."

"It's kind of a side-effect of having a fox, ahh…"

"God dammit Kakashi! Stop beating around the bush!" Iruka snapped, his legendary patience wearing thin. Kakashi's eye crinkled into a smile.

"MATING SEASON!" he boomed, loud enough for the entire hospital to hear.

* * *

Sasuke craned his neck to hear what was being said in his teammate's room, but alas, it was too quiet. Suddenly, as if answering his inner turmoil, he heard a loud "MATING SEASON!" come from the room.

Sakura heard it too. She shuddered.

'_Something really, really weird is going to happen, I can feel it.'_ She thought, sweatdropping. (LB: God I love that line.)

* * *

"Kakashi!" Iruka cried, putting a hand over the Jounin's mouth.

"What? I was only making sure they heard me!" he protested. Iruka blushed furiously.

"Yeah, and the rest of the hospital too!" he replied, grumbling. He was sure he just went deaf in one ear.

* * *

He had heard enough. Without warning, Sasuke walked by a confused Sakura, and exited out the window.

"Sasuke? Where are you going? SASUKE!" Sakura called after him, following him, although she didn't receive an answer.

Sasuke didn't hear the kunoichi following him. Or perhaps he did, but he didn't want to. All he wanted to do is go home, and somehow make it so, when he woke up in the morning, this day never happened. The events over the past many hours clouded his mind with more confusion, so that he actually had more questions now then when he started.

It all didn't make sense. Why did Naruto suddenly faint, and what did mating season have anything to do with it? Even so, what does Naruto have to do with mating season? Last time he checked, that was for wild animals, and he was pretty sure of Naruto was not. And what was this 'Kyuubi' that they were talking about? He was sure he had heard of it earlier, the name rang familiar, but what does that have to do with Naruto?

As Sasuke entered his manor, he was reminded of a jigsaw puzzle. Too many pieces that didn't seem to fit together. Or they did, but the way how had yet to dawn upon the raven-haired ninja. Sasuke locked himself in his room, and collapsed unto the bed, feeling instantly drained.

_'Why do I care about Naruto all of the sudden? I'm an Uchiha, I'm not supposed to care about other people, especially not another guy! Oh no, does that mean-'_ Sasuke sat bolt upright in his bed. He couldn't think that way about another guy!… Could he? Sasuke groaned inwardly. He rubbed his temples in stress. In the words of Shikamaru, today was troublesome. VERY troublesome.

_'Besides, the blonde isn't that sexy at all. Except if you take out that pout he has when he's sad, or his crystal blue eyes, or his scruffy blonde hair, or those little whisker-like scars on his face, or his beautifully tan skin, or the way he's so naïve, or…aw who am I kidding? Naruto is extremely sexy! But… what does he think of me? What am I standing next to the cute little dobe?'_

Sasuke groaned to himself. Thinking of Naruto like that had made him aroused. He tried to think of something different, but whatever he did, his mind kept wandering back to that one image of his dobe. One that is too rated X for this website. His hand twitched. Was he about to? He had to. There was no other way.

(LB: Lemon paragraph coming up!)

Slowly, his hand reached down to grasp his throbbing manhood. He started to move it up and down roughly, but he couldn't keep a suppressed moan from escaping his lips. Faster, harder, he stroked, a perverted fantasy playing out in his head. Sasuke started to moan louder, and louder. He knew he was attracting unwanted curiosity from people in earshot. He knew he was scaring the animals that nested outside his window, but he didn't care. All he wanted now was his body. Naruto's. He wasn't going to stop for anything.

As his own semen spilled into his hand, he gave a sigh of relief. He simply lied there, wanting the dark realms of slumber to swallow him now. He got up with a sigh, and changed his clothes. He wearily trudged back to the comfort of his own sheets, where he laid until his eyes willed themselves to close. And for once in what seemed like for an eternity, the Uchiha slept a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

**TBC**

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**LB:** Yes, it's still short, but I will stand by my theory that my attention span is way too short to write a really really long chapter. Now how was that for lemon? I'm getting better, I swear!

**Sasuke:** It was weird, if that's what you mean.

**LB: **Shut up! You know you liked it!

**Sasuke: **…

**LB: **R&R guys! I will be waiting for your comments on the chapter two, and I've got an idea for the chapter three and so on. So with any luck, the chapter three will be up by tomorrow…maybe.

**Kakashi:** Would you stop saying "The Chapter "! It's getting old! It also wasn't that funny in the first place.

**LB: **Hey, I can warp English as much as I want. (grumbles) Fucking grammar nazis.


	3. Sweet Dreams

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Warning:** This story contains yaoi. (Male on male love) If you don't like it, then stop reading now.

**Disclaimer: **I STILL don't own Naruto. P

**A/N:** Whenever I feel like the emo streak alarms are about to go off, I get a review, and the little storm clouds above my head blow away. I could not live without your comments, and I love you guys a lot! Thanks for all the wonderful advice, tips, and comments you all have given me! Ok, now I'm going to clear some stuff up:

**NO, **this will not be an Mpreg story. I don't like Mpreg, because it bothers me. I apologize if I gave any of you the idea that this fic would be one.

**NO, **I do not have a certain stopping chapter in mind. Unless I say otherwise, for now I do not plan on ending this thing anytime soon.

**YES, **I will probably have KakaIru in a later chapter. 

**YES, **I will introduce more characters. In fact, I will also include an extra pairing at a later chapter that remains a mystery for now. Just be patient with me!

**YES, **I will include the part with the Chuunin exams. That's also for further chapters. 

**-What to expect in later chapters-**

-More SasuNaru goodness 

-Lemons

-KakaIru goodness

-Mystery pairing I have yet to announce

-Tragedy

-The Chuunin Exams

That's all I'm gonna say for now. So now that I've wasted enough of your time, let's finally get to chapter three! Enjoy!

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**Chapter Three**

"Sweet Dreams"

Naruto was strolling down the streets of Konoha whistling a tune. Something dark out of the corner of his eyes caught his attention. He shrugged it off, and continued to walk. But the shadow kept following him. The hairs on the back of his neck were rising. His ninja instincts were telling him to escape. He quickly dashed into the forest to lose his pursuer. Bad idea. The shadow figure melted into the shadows of the trees, to where he could not tell where it was anymore.

Naruto ran for what seemed like forever. He took a rest, panting and sweating. He had expended more chakra than he wanted to in his panic.

'_Oh well, I've probably lost…whatever that was by now.'_ He thought cheerily, but his efforts to lie to himself weren't working. He couldn't force himself to believe his own words.

'_Alright conscience, I'll prove to you that there's nothing here!' _He thought to himself.

To prove his imaginary point, he scanned his nearby surroundings, and laughed at himself. He couldn't find anything unusual there. Then a sudden chill ran down his spine, and he spun around wildly, nothing there. He started walking briskly, to find his way back to the village, but he couldn't shake the hot, ragged breath that landed on the back of his neck.

"_Naruto…"_ he heard a voice whisper in his ear. This spooked the blonde out tremendously, and the broke out in a headlong run. He stopped when he thought he started to pick up insane, maniacal, eerie laughter echoing throughout somewhere in the distance. He looked around for a path that was familiar. There was none.

'_Wait…wasn't I just here?' _He pondered, but he shook his head and started running for fear, panic, and desperation.

All the time, Naruto was trying to find the path that lead back to the village. His innate senses of direction had left him a while ago. As he looked around, he could have sworn that he had passed that rock six times by now. All of the sudden he stopped.

Naruto was a slow person naturally. But slow is not the same as stupid. Finally he figured out what he was doing.

'_I've got to stop running. I'm just going in circles. It's all part of this…thing's plan, and I'm just falling into the trap by escaping.'_ He growled in his throat. Damn, he hated being stalked.

Suddenly out of the blue, the weird laughter had returned. Something cold and strong had grabbed his arms and legs, and was pulling him towards the ground.

"Aha, maybe running wasn't such a bad idea!" he cried out to himself, feeling foolish, and panicked. What in Kami was happening to him? He shut his eyes tightly; afraid of what was going to happen next.

The laughter stopped. The forces holding him receded. Instead he felt a different presence, one less frightening and more familiar. He re-opened his eyes. He saw a beautiful pale face looking down at him, raven black hair, and a navy blue shirt.

"Sasuke?"

It was indeed Sasuke. Sasuke was pinning the dobe down by his wrists where the malicious force was before. He was staring at Naruto with that 'I win' smirk on his face, and half-lidded, lust filled eyes.

"Sasuke, what are you-"

"Shh." He interrupted, leaning closer towards Naruto's blushing face.

'_Oh no!'_ Naruto's mind raced. _'He's gonna, he's gonna-Oh, no he's not.'_

Instead of kissing him like the dobe thought, Sasuke had leaned down by the ear, and whispered,

"Wake up."

Naruto looked confused.

"What?"

Sasuke's eyes bled red, he leaned his head up, and he hissed ferociously at Naruto.

"Wake up!" he barked.

* * *

"Wake up! Naruto, wake up, dammit!" 

Naruto snapped his eyes open. He was no longer in the forest, but in a hospital bed. With a mixed sigh of relief and disappointment, Naruto realized what happened.

It was all a dream.

A very good dream, at that. But none of it was real, unfortunately. Actually, part of him was thankful it wasn't real, it was just a little too creepy. But after it was over, the scent and presence of Sasuke lingered.

Naruto looked around. The person who was yelling at him to wake up a few moments earlier was still there. Kakashi.

"Maa, Kakashi-sensei, you ruined a very good dream!" Naruto pouted.

"Sorry, but we have a mission from the Hokage."

"A mission? Really?"

"Yes. Be at the gates by 3." And with that, he vanished.

* * *

Naruto was bouncing around his apartment jovially. A mission! He couldn't believe it. He was going on a mission! He loved missions! He also hadn't been on one in a while. 

"And I get to see Sasuke-kun!" he shrieked excitedly. Wait. Just then he sounded like one of Sasuke's billions of fangirls! Was he actually _excited_ to see Sasuke? When did this happen?

'_Well, I did have that dream about hi-wait, wait! Whoa, hold on! I DID have a dream about Sasuke!'_ with a small cry he realized that he was FANTASIZING about his teammate!

Naruto shook his head thoroughly. He was NOT going to wear himself out thinking about it. Besides, he had a mission!

* * *

"The sun is falling. Time to set up camp." Kakashi ordered, halting his students. They were deep in Lightning Country, delivering a secret package to the Raikage. They hadn't discovered much resistance, just a few small packs of brigands, but they weren't really going to see ninjas until they were closer to the village hidden in the clouds. 

As Team 7 unpacked their backpacks, Kakashi was going to check on their tents. There were four. With a mischievous glint in his eye, he discreetly destroyed one. Now there were three. (LB: 4-13) Then he turned around to his team to announce the "dilemma"

"Bad news guys." He said, with mock seriousness.

"Nani?" they asked in unison.

"There are only three tents."

The team looked around at each other with a gulp.

"That means two of us will have to room together."

**TBC**

* * *

**LB:** Oh, Kakashi, you naughty sensei! 

**Kakashi: **I have no idea what you're talking about.

**LB: **Sure…(sarcasm)

**Kakashi:** What? I don't!

**LB:** Yay for chapter three! R&R! I have something planned for the next chapter. (devilish smile)

(Sasuke and Naruto stares)

**Naruto:** Uh…Sasuke…she's scaring me.

**Sasuke:** Me too, dobe.


	4. Panic at Midnight

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Warning:** This story contains yaoi. (Male on male love) If you have something against it, then stop reading now.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned it, then I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.

**A/N: **I want to say my daily thanks for giving me the awesome reviews. A lot of people were waiting for this chapter, so I won't keep you waiting.

**Lemon Warning**

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Chapter 4

"Panic at Midnight"

"Hmm, now who should it be?" Kakashi wondered out loud.

"Sasuke-kun can sleep with me!" Sakura exclaimed, attaching to Sasuke's arm.

Sasuke was not enjoying this. He glared at Kakashi. He knew that this was a plan by that pervert.

"Actually, I was going to say Sasuke and Naruto, but if that's what you want…" stated Kakashi. Sasuke growled, feeling trapped.

"I'll room with Naruto." He grumbled, decided that the dobe was the lesser of two evils.

"Wait, don't I get a say in this! Why do I have to room with Sasuke-teme?" Naruto shouted, obviously displeased.

"Because Sakura is a girl, and I'm your 26 year old teacher. My word is final." The sensei said sternly, already setting up the tents with one of his many jutsus. Naruto sighed. This wasn't going to end well.

* * *

Naruto was covering himself in the sheets they brought, watching Sasuke warily out of the corner of his eye.

"Stay on your side, teme." He warned.

"Just don't keep me awake, dobe." Sasuke said coolly, turning out the lantern.

* * *

Sakura was tossing and turning in her tent. The night of the hospital was still bugging her in the back of her head. She decided to go across the camp to Kakashi's tent. As she passed her teammates' tent, she mentally murdered Naruto. Sasuke's virginity had to belong to her!

"Kakashi-sensei?" she asked, at the door of one tent.

"Come in." came the answer.

* * *

Sasuke stared at the top of the tent. He didn't fall asleep easily, but he believed that the blonde beside him was in a deep slumber. Suddenly he heard a squeak and a small moan come from his teammate's mouth.

'_He must be dreaming.'_ Sasuke thought peacefully.

"Ahh…Sasuke…"

Sasuke's eyes shot open. Did he just? No, couldn't have been. But he thought he just heard it.

"Sasuke…I want…"

'_Is the dobe dreaming of me?'_ Sasuke wondered happily, a devilish glint in his eye.

Without warning, Naruto rolled over, wrapping his arms over the Uchiha's chest, snuggling closer to him.

'_Ok.' _Sasuke thought. _'Two things aren't happening. Naruto isn't trying to cuddle me, and he definitely isn't making me excited in his sleep!'_

* * *

"Kakashi-sensei, I don't get it. What does mating season have to do with Naruto?" Sakura asked. She was sitting cross-legged on the ground. Her teacher was melted into one of the shadows, but she was used to it. She could feel his presence. Kakashi, on the other hand, was grinning behind his mask.

"Naruto has a…condition. Naruto is not in heat, but he has a pheromone."

"A what?"

"A pheromone. A chemical released by wild animals that affect others in some way. In this case, it's a pheromone that should only be for female animals, used to attract male mates."

"So that means…"

"It means there will be a lot of gay men around Konoha."

"Ok, one more question."

"Shoot."

"How do you know?"

"I can't tell you that." He snickered.

Sakura gulped. What was happening to Sasuke?

* * *

Sasuke refused to give in to the ninja who was whining and trying to make himself rape the dobe. He experimentally moved his hand down and gave the blonde's crotch a small stroke. In response, Naruto bucked, moaning outrageously loud.

'_Oh shit! Kakashi's going to hear us, that pervert!'_ Sasuke's mind panicked.

He tried to cover the blonde's mouth to stifle the sound, but it was a bad idea. A _really_ bad idea. In response, Naruto started licking, sucking, and biting Sasuke's fingers provocatively. Sasuke gritted his teeth.

'_Note to self: kill Naruto in the morning.'_

He didn't know what he was going to do. Someone was bound to hear them, and would intrude in the tent. And what they would see would be more than shocking.

Two naked males, one moaning and asleep, and the other one who is extremely close to raping the first. And the close body contact wasn't helping at all. Naruto then began to grind his groin into poor Sasuke, who wasn't enjoying this. Okay. Maybe he was. A little…hell, he was really enjoying this!

The problem is, Sasuke didn't know how he was going to stop. Well, stop without ending up fucking the life out of his teammate. Normally, he would have taken advantage of the situation, but it was neither the place NOR the time. He bit his lip so hard that a trickle of blood ran down his chin.

Then it stopped. Naruto opened those beautiful blue eyes, and it took him a second to realize what was going on. He was attached to Sasuke's side, pressing his crotch into his thigh, and Sasuke was awake. Very awake.

I could try to use words to describe how much Naruto blushed then, but it would still be an understatement. So I won't try. Naruto looked at Sasuke, who was looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Ahehe, Sasuke…" Naruto whimpered, immediately breaking contact from the Uchiha. He curled up on the other side of the sheets, to continue his dreaming silently.

Sasuke breathed a sigh of relief. That was too close.

'_Maybe now I can get some sleep.' _

* * *

(The next morning)

Naruto opened his eyes. He was alone in the tent. Sasuke was an early riser, so he guessed he was already up and about. Naruto yawned and stretched. He decided to get up, but it would be hard to be around Sasuke for a while. He was about to get his clothes when he noticed a large white stain he sported over his sheets.

'_Dammit! I hope Sasuke didn't notice that when he got up!'_

Lucky for him, Sasuke had not in fact, noticed it, but it would be really uncomfortable around the dobe for a while for him too. He was up making breakfast. He was always up early, which seemed like a lot earlier, especially since his team liked to sleep late. Naruto would be passed out, Sakura would spend a few hours preening herself, and Kakashi was just so lazy, he would probably be lying there staring at the ceiling until he decided to get up. (LB: Ha, that's what I do on the weekend mornings.)

Sasuke tried not to think about the "incident" that happened last night. But he couldn't stop thinking about it. And the more his mind dwelled on it, the more he wanted that blonde.

_'I want him to moan and scream out my name, I want to f-wait. Slow down. I'm on a mission, remember?'_

* * *

(Afternoon)

Team 7 was almost to the village hidden in the clouds. It seemed like the hundredth time they've had to show their passports to another ninja. But finally, they had made it to the Raikage's chamber. The three genin were waiting while their sensei delivered the package to the Raikage. Sakura was fantasizing about Sasuke, and thinking of ways to make Naruto's death look like an accident, but Sasuke and Naruto were desperately trying (and failing) to avoid eye contact.

* * *

(Back at the gates of Konoha)

It had taken another day to finally get back to their home village, but they made it happily. Thank god that they bought an extra tent on the way, or Sasuke would've gone crazy. They split on the streets. Sasuke made his way to the manor to angst silently and fantasize about his blonde teammate, Sakura had gone to go say hi to her parents, and Naruto had left to make his way to his apartment, which laid on the far edge of town.

On the way there, Naruto had taken a side route and was trying to cheer himself up by humming, but he couldn't shake the feeling that a pair of eyes were watching him. He tripped on an errant pile of empty boxes that were strewn into the street. He snorted to himself, and looked up, but he was frozen to the spot, when he saw another guy standing in front of him.

His eyes glittered coldly, and a chill smirk was on his face, that reminded him of Sasuke.

"What's this, a lost little ninja?"

**TBC**

* * *

**LB: **Yay! Another chapter down! The guy at the end is the mystery character in the plot twist I have coming up. You can think of who it is on your own, but I guess you won't find out 'till the next update!

**Sasuke:** Noooo! Naruto!


	5. Stolen Possessions

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Warning:** The fic contains yaoi, blah blah blah, etc.; skip it if you don't like it.

**Disclaimer:** Do you even think I own Naruto?

**A/N: **This chapter is a little late, I know, but school seriously took it out of me, so I'll get this up as fast as I can. You guys are going to hate me for this chapter, I just know.

I've gotten a lot of guesses as to whom the mystery character is. Most people said Itachi. I've also gotten a lot of e-mail guessing. There were some weird names mentioned. Gaara, Shino, Itachi, and Kankuro. There were a lot of others, but those were the ones that made the most sense. The others were just random. (Iruka, Ibiki, Kotetsu, Lee…) I would like to point out now that **nobody** guessed who it was. I thought he would be one of the first ones mentioned, but oh well. Read on to find out. Also, R&R, and tell me how surprised you were! 

**Lemon Warning**

* * *

**Chapter Five**

"Stolen Possessions"

Naruto backed up against a box. He knew who it was who was cornering him. He had seen him before, but never had he realized how frightening he was up close.

Hyuuga Neji

"You know, you shouldn't be running around the alleyways. You might get _hurt_." The pale-eyed ninja growled. Chills sped down Naruto's spine, and the feeling he had was similar to the one in his dream. He felt panicked, frightened, helpless, and _trapped._

'_Like a rat.'_ He thought bitterly.

In his spacing out, Naruto was not aware of the Hyuuga boy becoming ever closer to him. Neji knelt down, tracing a finger over the blonde's terrified features seductively. He received a shudder from his unexpected touch.

'_This is going to be fun.'_ He smirked.

* * *

Sasuke Uchiha was walking across his manor's lawn, taking the route towards the edge of town, and Naruto's apartment. He had a sudden urge to spy on his dobe, and try to see what he did while all alone. He suppressed a smirk. He could think of a lot of things he wouldn't mind watching.

He decided to take a shorter route to his house. Which meant passing by the less friendly part of town. But he didn't care. As he walked, his mind was filled with his perverted fantasies. He even walked by the same alleyway that his dobe was trapped in, but he didn't notice, due to his plots to rape Naruto.

* * *

Naruto looked around wildly for a chance to escape. As he looked towards the exit, he thought he saw a mess of black hair walk by. Shit. He _knew_ that mess of black hair!

"Sasuke!" he tried to cry out, but a bandaged hand flew to his mouth.

"Don't think that getting help will be so easy." Neji laughed coldly. Naruto's blood ran cold. Suddenly Neji raised a hand outstretched in the air.

"The art of the veil of silence!" he shouted.

Naruto was stunned. Did he just go deaf? What happened? Neji saw the look on his face, and chuckled.

"You like it? It's an invisible, sound-proof wall." Neji cackled. He leaned his face closer, so that their noses were touching.

"That means there will be no one to hear you scream."

Naruto squirmed for his life, but his captor was sitting on top of him, pinning him down. He watched the Hyuuga take out a kunai, and tore at Naruto's own orange jacket.

"Now let's see what's under this jacket."

* * *

Sasuke walked past his koi, sadly unnoticing the peril he was in. He hopped in Naruto's apartment's window, and took a look around.

'_It's quiet…Too quiet.'_ (LB: Sorry, I had to put that ) The Uchiha looked around. It was way too quiet for Naruto's house. He decided to make an investigation of the small apartment. It couldn't hurt, right?

He took a look around and was reassured that he was indeed in the kitchen. He opened a door and he was looking into the dobe's bedroom. The only other door in the bedroom lead into a small bathroom.

'_When I thought small, I didn't mean this small!' _He groaned inwardly. His eyes were drawn to a collection of photographs on the shelf next to his bed.

There was one of Iruka and him. There was one with Team 7. In fact, there was even one of Sasuke. Sasuke smirked at this.

'_But…he doesn't have any family photos.' _Sasuke's mind trailed. Come to think of it, he had never seen Naruto with any family. Was he an orphan?

'_You know he is.' _A malicious voice in the back of his head told him so. Then a sudden breeze through an open window snapped him back to the problem at hand.

'_Odd, he should have been back by now. Unless…' _he pondered on this for a second. Being a smart one, it didn't take him long to start bolting out the window.

"Oh no…" he groaned softly. "Naruto!"

* * *

Naruto closed his eyes tightly, trying not to think of the pain he was feeling. Neji had him trapped. He was without clothes. And he was being raped. Being. Raped.

'_This isn't happening. This is some twisted nightmare, and I'm just going to wake up right…now. Or not. Ok, how about, right…now! Damn!'_ Naruto was feeling waaaaaaay too many feelings at once. Pain. Anger. Humiliation. Desperation. Panic. _Fear. _

The thrusts at his abdomen began to get fewer, and longer pauses in between them. Then, like some sick porno, Naruto felt a surge of hot liquid enter his ass. Neji's grip on him went away. He slumped against the wall like a broken doll. Tears stained his face. The Hyuuga already re-donned his clothing, and was getting closer to the blonde.

He nipped at the blonde's neck, with a devilish glint in his eye.

"Nice meeting you, Uzumaki." He whispered icily, walking off, leaving the numb ninja behind.

Naruto tried his best to get on his clothes again, and he managed his pants, but his orange jacket was ruined, and his black undershirt was torn and dirty. He wrapped his arms around his knees, whimpering.

'_I promised…not…to…cry…'_ but his agony was too great. He looked towards the ground, trying to hide the salty teardrops that stained the ground.

"Dobe?" he heard an anxious voice. One that belonged to a certain Sasuke. Naruto didn't want to look at him in the eye. He didn't want anyone near him. He wanted the earth to swallow him up like the dirt he was.

* * *

Sasuke wrinkled his nose. The whole area wreaked of sex. And his dobe was sitting in the middle of it, shirt torn, clothes stained, dirty and crying.

"Naruto…" he whispered, gently kneeling next to him. Then he saw something that caught his eye. A rip in Naruto's shirt revealed a strange dark swirl on his stomach.

"Naruto…what is this?" he asked firmly. Naruto shook his head.

"I…can't." he whispered.

"Why not? Baka, tell me!"

"No! You'll hate me!"

"Will not! Now tell me!"

"The nine-tailed fox."

"What?"

"It's the seal of Kyuubi, the nine-tailed fox. Are you happy now?" he shouted.

Suddenly, to the Uchiha, the world made sense.

'_Kyuubi, mating season, fox, pheromones, the seal, the villager's cold looks, it all makes sense!'_ his mind yelled, and he was reminded of a jigsaw puzzle again. Except this time, it was completed.

In his momentary happiness, Sasuke hugged Naruto in joy.

"Sasuke…what are you doing? This isn't like you…are you sure you're feeling okay?" Naruto asked, overwhelmed. An errant pale hand dropped and brushed Naruto's abdomen. Naruto winced visibly, and let out a small yelp of pain.

Happiness forgotten, Sasuke's face hardened again. His worst suspicions were confirmed.

"Naruto…what happened?" he asked threateningly.

"I can't tell you." Naruto whined like a small puppy.

"Who did this to you?" he demanded fiercely. His hands were balled into fists. Whoever raped his dobe was going to pay.

**TBC**

* * *

**LB: **Yeah… not one of my best chapters. Oh well, that's just what I think. Now do you guys hate me for writing this? And who honestly was surprised at who raped Naruto? Okay, don't yell at me. (cowers) What have I done to my main character!

**Sasuke: **My Naruto! (hugs Naruto plushie worriedly)

**Naruto: **My ass! (Hugs…erm…)

**I'm going to write this random sentence here so this chapter will have more than 1,400 words. Ignore my weirdness.**


	6. Stressed is Desserts Backwards

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Warning: **Whoo, this fic contains yaoi and you've seen this before.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own it! Stop mocking me!

**A/N: **I'm delighted at your response to chapter 5. Honestly. But no, I'm afraid that there will be no murder in this fic. It's a Romance/Comedy remember! But don't despair, Sasuke will get his revenge.

So as compensation, I give this to you: the ever longed for KakaIru chapter! Took me long enough for my muse to give me something to work with, so I apologize for the wait. Hope this was well worth it! Let's not keep you waiting, shall we? Enjoy!

**Lemon Warning**

* * *

Chapter Six

"Stressed is Desserts Backwards"

Kakashi sighed and slowly made his way to his empty apartment. The mission had taken a lot out of him, and he just wanted to crash. He opened the door, and lied down on his bed. He sighed. Five washes and the sheets _still_ smelled like dog. As he stared at the ceiling, he silently wondered what his koi, Iruka, was doing.

A sudden inspiration hit him. He slipped out of bed. He would find out what Iruka was doing. And he knew exactly how. He snuck out of the window ninja-style, and sniggered quietly.

'_Tonight's going to be fun.'_

* * *

Iruka slipped his lithe, tan body under the scalding hot water. The steam sizzled as the surface of the bath was disturbed. The Chuunin sighed. He could swear he had the most stressful job in the Konoha. Constantly chiding kids, listening to whining, keeping your patience, trying to teach, and grading papers really takes a number on you.

The brown-haired nin sank down lower to the hot water, closing his eyes. Somewhere he thought he heard a small splash by his foot, but he ignored it. He let out another deep sigh.

"It's really relaxing."

Iruka nodded. Wait…since when was he not alone? He looked over his shoulder, and sure enough, a pale, silver-haired nin was staring back at him, smiling.

"Kakashi!" Iruka yelled, quickly drawing his legs back to his chest. "Do you have to be everywhere?"

"Yes." He replied cheerfully, his eye crinkling into an upside-down U. Without warning, Kakashi moved his arm over Iruka's shoulder, straddling his koi.

"Um, Kakashi?" Iruka blushed.

"Mmm?"

"What are you doing?"

"Hush."

Iruka felt the jounin's hot breath against his neck. His heart was thudding in his chest.

"Kaka-ah-shi!" he managed to pant out.

"Yes, Ruka?" Kakashi asked, grinning. He loved doing this to the Chuunin.

Iruka pushed Kakashi off. None too gently either. Kakashi faked a sob.

"No, bad Kakashi! Bad!" Iruka scolded him, like he was a dog. He wrapped a towel around himself, and then went outside the bathroom, leaving the pouting Jounin behind him.

Luckily, Iruka had time to throw on a robe before he was tackled again. He looked back to see a certain person embracing him from behind. He sighed. At least Kakashi had _some_ clothes on this time.

"What do you want?" he asked, exasperated.

"Maa, I'm not allowed to come over for dinner?"

Iruka gave another sigh. He had that pout on again. He knew he was irresistible with that face!

"I don't know you mean by din-"

"Yay!"

Kakashi gave a squee then skipped to the kitchen, humming random notes. Iruka followed, dumbfounded.

"I thought I was-"

"Sit. You need to relieve your stress, remember?"

He sighed. Kakashi was right. He slumped on the couch, worn out, staring at the ceiling, until a tasty smell wafted from the kitchen.

"What are you cooking? Smells good…" Iruka asked.

"Food." Came the reply.

"Gee. Real specific."

"Yep."

Moments later, Kakashi came out of the kitchen, holding something covered in his hand.

"What is it?" Iruka asked.

"Close your eyes and you see."

Iruka hesitated to shut his eyes. He knew how much of a pervert Kakashi could be. But nonetheless, he closed his lids, hoping it wasn't what he thought it was.

A piece of food was pushed into his mouth gently.

'_Thank god it's actually food.'_ Iruka thought. Then he gave a squeal of delight. His favorite! Kakashi chuckled.

"Thought you'd like it."

In less than ten minutes, Kakashi was done feeding his koi.

"What's for dessert?" Iruka asked innocently. Kakashi giggled. Oh, _he_ knew what dessert was.

In a flash, Kakashi grabbed Iruka and wrestled him unto the floor. He was pinning him down, holding his shoulders with his hands.

"I win already." He smirked.

"Nuh-uh!"

Almost as fast as Kakashi pinned him, Iruka pressed his foot against his koi's stomach, using it as a lever to flip them over.

"You lose."

"You wish!"

This started an innocent (yet very sexy) wrestling match between the two males. Finally, when it seemed like Iruka had really won, Kakashi crawled up behind him. (They're both kneeling) He wrapped his arms under Iruka's and used his thighs to pry the chuunin's apart.

In the middle of the wrestling, Kakashi had face-planted on Iruka's crotch "accidentally", and had gave the brown-haired male an annoying arousal. Now the current position wasn't helping at all. Iruka was totally helpless, and if that wasn't enough, Kakashi's arousal was grinding into Iruka's backside, and the more he squirmed, the more the friction increased.

Iruka whimpered. His robe was starting to become loose and fall off his shoulders. Now it was open enough for his koi to barely see his crotch, which he wasn't really comfortable with exposing. He tried to squirm his way out, but he didn't get anywhere. All he got was more rubbing and panting on the back of his neck. Iruka started to sound like a little puppy. He was completely and utterly helpless.

"Mercy?" Kakashi grunted.

"Never!" Iruka hissed

"Be that way."

Iruka immediately regretted his stubbornness. Kakashi had made the moment even more compromising (If that was possible) by willingly grinding his hips into Iruka's. Iruka started moaning softly.

"Give up yet?"

"…"

"Didn't hear you."

"D-damn you!"

"So is that a no?"

"Gah, Kakashi! Jinkei! Otaku shouri!" (Translation: "Gah, Kakashi! Mercy! You win!")

"That's what I thought."

Kakashi flipped the Chuunin over unto his back, but the movement caused the front of the robe to fly open, exposing part of the brown-haired nin's chest. He took the opportunity to lean down and nipped gently, slightly under the collarbone. He almost purred when he received a sharp intake of breath for a response.

"Kakashi…you know I'm a guy, right?" Iruka whispered hoarsely. His eyes glittered with excitement, literally begging for more.

"So? You know you liked it." Kakashi grunted, in that rough too-sexy-for-his-shirt voice.

"…What makes you so sure?"

"Because you could always stop me."

Iruka bit his lip. Once again, Kakashi was too clever, and he was right. He knew he would be considered strange if people knew he had gay sex. With the one and only Hatake Kakashi, for that matter. The so-called "most dangerous ninja in Konoha". But why was he enjoying it? Why was he not pushing the other male off?

Kakashi took his time in torturing the other ninja slowly. He swirled his tongue around the other's erect nipple, alternating with sucking and biting. Damn, Iruka tasted good.

'_I wonder what the rest of Iruka tastes like…'_ he thought blissfully. He slowly undid the rest of his robe, exposing what he wanted to see for the entire night.

Iruka gave out an "eep" as his clothing was stripped off.

"Not fair!" he whined

"What's not fair, Ruka-kun?"

"This."

Iruka sat up, toppling over the Jounin. He roughly tugged off the others robe, squealing when it came open. Then Kakashi pinned Iruka down again.

"Are you happy now?"

"Yes."

"Good."

Kakashi forced his lips upon Iruka's, groaning softly. Iruka returned the grunt of affection. Kakashi took the opportunity to slide his tongue in the other's mouth. Iruka forced back, trying to be the dominant. The battle had begun. The two had shifted slightly, so that the chuunin's back was forced against the wall. In the end of the shoving and pushing, the Jounin had won.

Iruka gave in to his koi, leaning backwards.

'_Thank god for the wall.'_

Kakashi broke the kiss, returning back to his neck. His hot breath played upon his dark skin, and a hand laid itself inside Iruka's thigh. The Jounin was delighted at the shivers running through his koi as a response.

"Kashi…douzo…"(Translation: "Kashi…please…")

"Mama otaku sachi." (Translation: "As you wish.")

The silver-haired nin spread the other male's legs gently, dipping his head down to breathe warmly on the already stiff member. Iruka gasped, whimpering pitifully.

"Are you sure?" Kakashi asked, his nose barely grazing the other male's sensitive skin.

"Yes!" Iruka hissed. Kakashi nodded, licking the tip slowly, taking his time in torturing the chuunin. Finally, when he was done tasting him, he took the entire part in his mouth, enjoying the taste, although not as much as Iruka was.

It took all the strength remaining in Iruka to keep from bucking. If he did, he was sure he would choke his lover. That wouldn't end well. His hands ran over the smooth wall behind him, flailing around for something to grasp unto. Finally he found his robe, which was discarded randomly. He gripped the smooth fabric, as he was unable to restrain his moans. He also couldn't bear to look down at the bobbing silver head in his crotch. He was already blushing enough. Suddenly, a random thought clicked.

'_This isn't what I meant by dessert!'_

Kakashi, on the other hand, was surely enjoying himself. He had long forgotten such carnal pleasures, since he had been without friends or family for most of his adulthood. Sure, he and Obito had…_experimented_, although nothing was past kissing. The poor man had been deprived of all emotions, save anger, since he was left alone in this world.

(Flashback)

A young Kakashi sat, stunned by the past events. He had recently come back from a mission, but since he came back, something was missing. No, not something. _Someone_. His teammate, one of his only friends, and until recently, his secret love. Uchiha Obito. The memory of his perpetual grin still burned in his mind. That and, one question, that never seemed to go away.

'_Why?'_

'_Why did it have to be me, that has to suffer? Why couldn't it have been me? Why do I have to be the one who was left behind? Why did you have to be so goddamn courageous?'_ he whimpered, as he sat on the side of his bed. He had never known his parents, and that was fine with him. He was honestly fine with living alone, but he never thought that actually _living_ alone would seem so difficult.

As he sat, the images of the past few hours relayed in his head. They were on their way back from a mission, but a damned enemy ninja had put a jutsu on the cave they were staying in, and made it start to collapse. As always, Obito was the kind one, so he _had_ to be the one to be the hero. He _had_ to stay behind, and hold up the roof of the cave to let his friends out. He was even trying to help their escape by performing a jutsu to hold the entrance intact.

_'That idiot, he didn't even try to save himself. He kept bugging us about he had a bad feeling about this mission, but we ignored him. And when he saw Rin and I trying to escape, he had to be the hero! He knew he was going to die that time, but the baka didn't attempt to save himself!'_

The young Kakashi sniffed as a few teardrops stained the carpet.

_'You promised, Obito. You promised that we would always be together! You left me. You didn't keep your promise, and you left Rin and I here, alone! I really will never understand you, chijin.'_ (Chijin means friend.) (LB: God dammit, I'm crying now.)

* * *

Kakashi stared at the writing on his friend's grave. Beside him was Rin, trying her hardest to hold back her sobs. Kakashi laid a pair of ski goggles, Obito's favorite accessory, on the grave. Now neither of them were doing very well in holding back their tears, once it had finally sunk in that their best friend was gone.

Somehow, something in the young male ninja's mind snapped. From then on, he became numb, and completely devoid of emotion. He felt no sorrow, no grief, no anger. All he wanted was his best friend back, so things could be normal again. It was too late. Everything had already changed, and both nins who were left behind would be scarred forever.

* * *

"Congratulations, Kakashi!" The cheery voice brought him back to reality. He opened his eyes, and he was lying in a hospital bed, with Rin looking over him, grinning. He also noticed that the left side of his face was heavily bandaged.

"The operation was a success."

"…Operation?"

"Well, we were going to give you a present for finally becoming a Jounin, so we did."

"What did you do?"

"Let's just say you now have a little piece of Obito with you for the rest of your life."

Kakashi sat bolt upright at the mention of his late teammate's name. His hand grazed gingerly over his eye, which was covered in thick white bandages. He winced at the contact, realizing what exactly the operation was for.

"How did you get his eye from his body?"

"Shinobi can be amazing sometimes."

* * *

Kakashi stood at the graveyard again. Déjà vu. Two years had passed since he earned Obito's eye, and now, his remaining teammate, and his only living friend, Rin, had died. They said she died of unknown causes, and no one quite knew the circumstances. Already emotionless due to the death of Obito, Kakashi had no tears left to shed for the kunoichi. He was finally able to crack a sad smile when he realized that he was left alone in the world.

The Jounin walked away from the grave stone-faced, his hands held in his pockets. Everything was happening too fast, and the poor ninja could do nothing but watch his life story go into a downhill spiral. Like a slow train wreck, he knew that pretty soon, all of this was bound to happen, but he didn't know how, when, and especially why. The accursed word haunted him for all his life. Why did these things always happen to him? Why did he suddenly find himself alone and without anyone that cares for him?

If it wasn't for his better judgment, and the fact that his village needed him, Kakashi would probably be at the point of his own kunai by now. But he had to remain strong. The village was already shaken by the Uchiha's death, the events concerning the Kyuubi, and an intriguing young vessel named Naruto. Kakashi had already put in on a list in his mind, to learn more about the boy, but he had no idea that sooner or later he would get his wish. This was how Hatake Kakashi earned his eye, and his state of emotions.

(End of Flashback)

**TBC**

* * *

**Kakashi:** That wasn't exactly a KakaIru chapter, LB.

**LB:** Yeah well, I kind of got carried away. Besides, I wasn't really up to writing a full lemon, and it isn't even the main pairing! Ah well, my muse is good to me. (Forgets that it's physically impossible to hug my muse and hugs him anyway)

**Arven:** Space! (Forgets that it's physically impossible to push me off of him, but pushes me anyway)

**LB:** Yep, now that I've officially scarred ¼ of you for life, I want to apologize to the remaining ¾ of you for the really long wait. Yes, I was really, actually going to make it a lemon, but instead, I kind of got obsessed with Kashi-kun's past instead. Whoops. My bad. Ahehe. So well, after this, I promise to get back to the action with Sasuke and Naruto! Ja ne!


	7. Sweet Revenge

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Disclaimer:** I'm getting tired of writing these, but I assume that if everybody had their way, we would all have a massive world war over who would own Naruto, so I'll just leave it to Kishimoto.

**Warning:** Yes, this fic contains yaoi, if you didn't know already. If you have something against it, then I don't like you.

**A/N:** Well, I don't really have a good enough excuse for why this is so late, so I'll just cut to the chase and tell you the news. LB is on strike, because she isn't getting any good ideas, (kicks Arven) and I have deleted WtEDS off FF. I no longer had the time, desire, or good ideas to continue it, but oh well. 

**Kakashi:** Geez, what's with the sudden bad mood?

**Neji:** (shrugs) Writer depression.

**LB: **Shut up and read.

**Lime Alert?**

* * *

**Chapter Seven**

"Sweet Revenge"

Hatake Kakashi was sitting at a table, in a restaurant. The strange atmosphere was confusing. Never mind the fact that the last thing he remembered was being in Iruka's apartment, the fact of he didn't know his surroundings was bothering him. He had never been here, he didn't know why he was here, how he got here was a mystery, fourth, he didn't know why he couldn't remember anything.

The second thought that occurred to him was that this was a dream. But normally, one doesn't feel in a dream, yet the table in front of him was as solid as ever. So that was out the window.

Interrupting his musings, a familiar face came in the restaurant and sat down, grinning.

"It's been a while, ae?" ("ae" is pronounced like "eye" or "aye") Kakashi froze. There was only one person he knew that said "ae". He spun around, and had to make sure that his eyes didn't lie. The grin and ski goggles could only mean,

"Obito?" he gaped, astounded.

'_If this is a dream, don't wake me.'_

Another thought led Kakashi into looking over at himself quickly. His ninja vest was still there, and he wasn't put into his old cross-belt outfit, but his teammate looked exactly like the last time Kakashi saw him. Then, as if that wasn't enough shock, Rin appeared and sat down with a squeal of "Kakashi-kun!". Kakashi was stuttering, unable to speak. It was like he just died and went to heaven. Of course, heaven wasn't complete without,

"Hey kiddoes!" Yondaime had appeared too, and they were all sitting down at the table, waiting for their friend to get over himself and say something.

This was ridiculous.

"What are you all doing here?" Kakashi demanded, suddenly finding the ability to talk. Obito shrugged.

"It's been awhile, and we wanted to talk to you. Speaking of, you've grown a lot." Rin commented, smiling. Yondaime nodded.

"I've also heard that Kakashi has his own genin team. Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke, and Haruno Sakura." He said, smiling gently.

"Mmhmm, and if I'm not mistaken, Kakashi has a boyfriend, ae?"

Kakashi's face turned a light shade of pink under his mask, and he looked away quickly. Rin and Obito giggled.

"Well, tell the lucky bastard Iruka that I said 'hi', ae?"

"Wait, where are you going?" Kakashi asked. His vision was blurring, and fading out slowly.

"Oops! Looks like you're waking up, Kakashi. Well, we'll talk to you later!" Yondaime waved, along with the rest of them.

'_No! I don't want it to end already!'_ Kakashi tried to reach out for his friends, but it was too late. He opened his eyes, and he was in a bed. The restaurant and his friends were gone.

Then another realization presented itself. This wasn't his bed! And by the looks of it, he wasn't alone in it either. There was a warm spot and a depression on the other side.

'_What the hell?'_

"Ah, so you're awake, Mr. 'Can't-keep-his-hands-to-himself'." Iruka taunted, looking down at the Jounin nestled under his own sheets. He was standing over the Jounin, hands placed on his hips, and grinning. Kakashi mentally bashed his head against a wall.

'_Duh!'_ last night's escapade was finally flooding back to him. He groaned, burying his face in the pillow.

"This early in the morning?" he gave a whine, but most of it was muffled in the pillow.

"Early! Hell, it's 10:45! Besides, don't you have to meet your team sometime soon?" Iruka asked, getting on the bed and straddling the lump that was Kakashi's legs. The ninja in question got his head out of the pillow, and raised an eyebrow.

"Don't _you_ have to teach or something?"

"Nope, I have a day off." Iruka grinned in a childish manner.

"Well, I didn't have training scheduled for today, so…"

"That means we have the whole day to ourselves." Iruka purred, leaning over and pressing his lips against his koi's. Kakashi's eyes widened. He was surprised at Iruka's sudden action, but he wasn't complaining. But still, he couldn't shake the feeling that he had to do something…

* * *

Daybreak found Uchiha Sasuke walking across the less crowded part of Konoha, an overly eager blonde in tow.

"C'mon, Sasuke!"

"No."

"Just one bowl?"

"I said NO, dobe."

Naruto started pouting. Sasuke remained stoic and emotionless. Inwardly, he was relieved at the fact that walking around with Naruto was like carrying a fangirl-repellant. He may have to be around Naruto more often…

"Uchiha." The cold voice broke Sasuke from his thoughts.

"Hyuuga."

Sasuke would have walked on, but instead a certain glint in the Hyuuga's blank eyes was disturbing him otherwise. If he wasn't mistaken, Neji was staring at Naruto _hungrily._ And Naruto was uncharacteristically hiding from Neji behind Sasuke's back, shivering. Did that mean…?

'_Oh hell no.'_ he thought, putting one and one together.

"I believe you have something of mine, Uchiha." Neji stated coldly, staring at the blonde, who was quivering behind Sasuke.

"Obviously he doesn't want to be with you, Hyuuga." Sasuke answered back, spitting out Neji's last name like it was rotten.

"He knows that belongs to me. Don't you, Uzumaki?" Neji beckoned Naruto, his voice dripping with malice. To the Uchiha's horror, Naruto nodded meekly, and stepped out from behind him, his head lowered towards the ground. The usually cheerful blonde starting walking slowly towards Neji, a beaten look on his face.

"Naruto!" Sasuke gasped. He took a step forward. Hell was going to freeze over before he let that bastard take his Naruto! …Wait. Since when did he care? And since when was the dobe "his Naruto"?

During his momentary confusion, "his Naruto" had slowly walked over to the brown-haired genin. Neji drew his arms around the blonde protectively, smirking at the gawking Sasuke. Naruto turned his crystalline blue gaze towards the raven-haired nin, sorrow emanating from the depths. Sasuke was shocked. This was the first time he had ever seen the dobe like this. He was usually so cheerful, and seeing him so sad made him depressed. He wanted to grab Naruto, and put the grin back on his face, but he was frozen to the spot.

Before he knew what was happening, the yellow ball of sunshine in question was being taken away in the direction of the Hyuuga manor.

* * *

Naruto looked around. He knew where he was being dragged, and what was going to happen to him. He shut his eyes tightly.

'_Come on Kyuubi, I need you!'_

No reply.

'_Please, Kyuubi!'_

Still Nothing.

'_If you don't come out, I'll come in after you!'_

Nada.

'_KYUUBI!'_

'_**Be quiet, kit. You're annoying.'**_

'_If you don't help me, I'll get raped again!'_

'_**I can't fight during mating season kit.'**_

'_Oh yay, but now isn't the best time to break this to me!'_

'_**Sorry kit. You're on your own this time.'**_

Naruto stopped struggling and sighed. It was hopeless. Neji would kick his normal ass and the Kyuubi wasn't going to help him. He looked around for a chance to escape. There was none. They were walking inside the Hyuuga manor now. The blonde saw a maid look pityingly at him out of the corner of his eye. He rolled his eyes.

'_That's comforting.'_

A door opened and he was shoved cruelly into a dark room. His eyes strained to see anything in the darkness, but he couldn't make out any shapes or size. He saw a movement in front of him and he guessed it was Neji.

Neji drew the curtains of a window open, flooding the room with light. Looking over at his blonde, he scowled.

A red hand-shaped mark stung on the side of Naruto's face.

"OW! What was that for!" he yelled.

"For trying to disobey me. You are my toy and no one else's. You understand that?" he growled, lurking over the twitching ninja ominously. (LB: Whoo. LB used a big word.)

Naruto was huddled on the hard floor, his fists clenched in anger. He rose slowly, his head bowed, and his hands at his sides. His voice was trembling with fury as he spoke.

"He's. Not. Your."

"TOY!" He screamed, punctuating the last word with a well-aimed punch to the pale nin's face. Neji, who was caught off guard, fell backwards, and winced as he laid sprawled on the ground. He propped himself up slightly by his elbows on the ground behind him.

"He?"

A poof of purple smoke, and Naruto was gone. In his place was a certain Uchiha, smirking at his revenge. Neji coughed in surprise.

"Bastard!"

"And they say Naruto is the dumb one."

"What did you do to Naruto?"

"Oh, he's still sleeping. Funny thing, actually. He was never outside all along." Sasuke laughed coldly.

(Explanation: Sasuke used the art of shadow cloning and the art of transformation. When they were walking, Sasuke used his clone to act like him, and the real Sasuke transformed into Naruto in order to bait Naruto's attacker. When Neji came, he thought he was taking Naruto, but he was really taking Sasuke. The Sasuke clone disappeared after Neji left. Once Neji had the "Naruto" alone, Sasuke released the jutsu, revealing it was really himself. Simple!)

"Speaking of, I think he should be waking up pretty soon. Ja!" Sasuke jumped out of the window, his voice loud and mocking. He left Neji to sit there, stunned, trying to think of how he was outsmarted by that bastard.

The real blonde was still fast asleep, as expected, curled under the covers of Sasuke's own bed unsuspectingly. Sasuke strolled slowly around the corner into his room, a ghost of a smile on his face. He walked up to the side of the bed quietly, hovering over his blonde. His hand reached out and gently stroked Naruto's chin line, smirking sweetly at the small appreciative gasp he got in response.

Naruto's mouth was slightly open, his head tilted upwards.

'_He's perfect.'_ Sasuke thought, then an idea presented itself.

'_You know, not many can resist a temptation like this.'_ He thought, as he leaned over to take the dobe in a soft kiss. And for a short moment, Sasuke forgot about Neji, Itachi, and all the problems in his life. For a short moment, everything was perfect.

"Sasuke, do you know where Naruto is?"

Sasuke panicked. He knew that voice. He knew that voice damn well. He quickly broke away from his obsession, looking over in the window.

Of course, it would be Hatake Kakashi.

Unfortunately for the Uchiha, he was too late. His teacher had seen enough, and he was sniggering mischievously under his mask.

"Oops, I'll tell you lovebirds later, I guess. Just meet the team by the river in two hours." Kakashi stated, trying hard not to break up laughing. He turned around on the windowsill, preparing to leap wherever, but he couldn't resist the urge to turn his gaze over his shoulder.

"Oh. Sasuke, congrats." And with that, he was off with the sound of his own laughter echoing off.

It was then when Naruto's brain decided to tell him to wake up. Something wasn't right. As soon as it clicked that he was in Sasuke's bed, he started squirming uncontrollably. The bundle that was the fox vessel tipped off the edge, blankets and all. Sasuke ignored him, his face hot, and his fists clenched in anger and humiliation. His teacher knew. His fucking teacher knew! He was wondering how long it would be until that damn pervert told everyone in Konoha. (LB: Should I stop here? I think I shall.)

**TBC**

* * *

**LB: **Whoo! Another chapter down! (gives self a cookie)

**Kakashi:** Wait, wasn't she supposed to be in a bad mood at the beginning of the chapter?

**Neji:** Stop complaining. At least YOU got laid last night. (Nurses side of face)

**LB: **Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, that I totally made up the fact that Obito says "ae". I know he doesn't, I just needed an idiosyncrasy there. Don't sue me.


	8. Brotherly Love

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Warning:** If you already don't know what this is going to say, you're stupid.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the hot bitches that are in Naruto, sadly. If I could, then I could think of a few names that I would claim…

The song is Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge. I don't own that either. Waaah!

**A/N:** Have you ever felt like bursting out dancing randomly? I just did, and it made my little wave of sadness go away. You should try it. This is what this fic is dedicated to. Ok, not really.

* * *

**Chapter Eight**

"Brotherly Love…Or Not"

_Got a big plan, his mind said maybe it's right_

_At the right place, the right time, maybe tonight_

_In a whisper, or handshake, sending the signs_

_Want to make out, and kiss hard-Wait never mind_

_Late night, in passing, mentioned it slipped to her_

_Best friend, it's nothing, just let it slip_

_But the slip turns to terror and a crush to like_

_And she walked in, he froze up, leave it to fright_

_It's cute in a way until you cannot speak,_

_And you live to have a cigarette, knees get weak_

_Escape was just a nod and a casual wave_

_Obsess about it heavy for the next few days_

_It's only just a crush, it will go away,_

_It's just like all the others, it will go away_

_Or maybe this is danger and you just don't know_

_You pray it all the way but it continues to grow_

_I want to hold you close_

_Skin pressed against me tight_

_Lie still, close your eyes girl_

_So lovely, it feels so right_

_I want to hold you close_

_Soft breath, beating hard_

_As I whisper in your ear_

_I want to fucking tear you apart_

"Uhh, Sasuke?" Naruto piped up from his position on the floor. Snapped out of his murderous thoughts, Sasuke glanced at the fidgeting pile of sheets on the floor.

"Dobe?"

"Why was I in your bed?"

"Neji raped you, dobe."

"Oh, right."

…

"Sasuke?"

"Dobe?"

"Could you help me?"

Sasuke sighed, fighting back a smirk. He knelt down in front of the mass of sheets, pulling corners here, doing stuff there, when he finally got to the layer that covered Naruto. He flipped over a section, which was right over-

"Kami!" he cursed, falling backwards startledly. He shut his eyes, trying to rid himself of what he just saw, but he couldn't help the blood that slowly started to drip out of his nose.

He had forgotten that Naruto wasn't wearing clothes.

"What!" Naruto asked, oblivious to his own nudity. He waited until Sasuke finally blurted,

"Clothes!"

Naruto was even more confused. He looked over himself, until he finally realized that all of his clothes were gone. Instead of hiding himself, a vein bulged in his forehead, and he stood up, pointing an accusing finger at Sasuke and shouting,

"Sasuke! Baka teme no hentai!" (Baka-idiot Teme-bastard hentai-pervert)

"It's not my fault! Your clothes were ruined!" Sasuke yelled, matching the blonde's volume.

"Well how do I know I'm a virgin, huh?"

"You aren't! Neji took care of that!" the Uchiha snarled, a hint of jealously and bitterness in his voice. Naruto paused a moment, thinking.

"Oh yeah…"

"Tch, baka."

"What'd you call me!"

"Get some clothes on!"

"But I don't-"

Interrupting him, Sasuke threw him some random clothes from his closet. He then stormed out of the room. Naruto failed to notice his face was still a burning red. He shrugged, and threw on the pile of random clothes that the Uchiha a thrown at him. When he was done, he looked at himself in a mirror. He was wearing a pair of khaki shorts, and a skin-tight white shirt. Despite the fact that he got the clothes from Sasuke, Naruto approved, looking himself over with a nod.

"Are you done yet? I swear, you take as long as a girl." The irritated voice came from outside the door.

"Did anyone ever tell you how impatient you are?"

"Dobe."

"Teme."

…

"Okay, I'm done."

Sasuke opened the door with a smirk. The dobe looked extremely sexy, much more than the normal orange jumpsuit.

"Sasuke?"

"Hn?"

"W-why did you…?"

Sasuke's heart started beating out of control. He knew what the dobe was asking, but did he want to hear the answer? _'This is it. Now or never, Sasuke.'_ He thought, but he didn't realize how hard it was just to force out the words. He was afraid he was going to make a fool of himself, though. _'Who cares? Say it now! He's waiting on you!'_

"I…"

'_Yes, that's it Sasuke, just two more words.'_

"You…"

'_Okay, I guess that works too…'_ Sasuke was no longer in control of his tongue. He just hoped what would come out would be good.

"…You're like a little brother!" he blurted, but was immediately taken aback of what he said.

'_Shit, if I'm lucky he didn't hear it.'_

Unfortunately, Naruto did hear it.

"Aww, Sasuke, that's sweet of you." He squealed, his eyes crinkling in upside-down U's.

'_The dobe didn't get it. Damn!'_

"Oh yeah. We were supposed to meet Kakashi today." Sasuke stated quickly, trying to change the awkward subject. Naruto nodded, grabbing the Uchiha's arm and running in the direction of the river.

"Let's go then!"

And he walked up, and told her thinking maybe it'd pass 

_And they talked and looked away a lot, doing the dance_

_Her hand brushed up against his, she left it there_

_Told him how she felt, and then they locked in a stare_

_They took a step back, thought about it, what should they do?_

'_Cause there's always repercussions when you're dating in school_

_But their lips met, and reservations started to pass_

_Whether this was just an evening, or a thing that would last_

_Either way, he wanted her and this was bad_

_Wanted to do things to her, it was making him crazy_

_Now a little crush turned into a like_

_And now he wants grab her by the hair and tell her,_

_I want to hold you close_

_Skin pressed against me tight_

_Lie still, close your eyes girl_

_So lovely, it feels so right_

_I want to hold you close_

_Soft breath, beating hard_

_As I whisper in your ear_

_I want to fucking tear you apart_

"Sasuke-kun!" the annoying voice rang out shrilly, causing the announced nin to jump slightly. He would have jumped, but once again, he was Uchiha Sasuke.

"Sakura's here." Naruto mumbled. The two boys leaned on the single tree. Sasuke stood and leaned backwards, angsting, because well, he was good at it. Naruto lost interest in trying to communicate a few minutes back, and slumped on the ground, daydreaming, or thinking of whatever.

"Yep." Sasuke mumbled back, neither one feeling energetic enough to speak out loud or make eye contact at the moment. (LB: I hate those days.)

The bubble-gum haired kunoichi ran up to the two. She tried at first to get Sasuke's attention, by waving a hand in front of his face to get his attention.

'_Odd, Sasuke never spaces out like this.'_ She pondered, then was double surprised to see Naruto _sitting_. He wasn't even fidgeting, much less talking!

'_Okay, something's wrong.'_

"Naruto! Have you tried that new flavor of ramen yet? I heard it's really…good…"Sakura tried to get a decent conversation out of the blonde, but she trailed and broke off when it was obvious he wasn't paying any attention to her. I mean, if the word 'ramen' won't get his attention, what will? (LB: Extra brownie points to whoever can guess what Naruto and Sasuke are daydreaming about.)

Sakura huffed and sat down cross-legged, propping her head up on a hand. She was going to go crazy if that blasted teacher didn't show up soon. The silence bugged her, because it was so unnatural. Luckily for her sanity, she didn't have to wait long.

Kakashi arrived in a flash, breaking the two boys out of their silence.

"Yo kids." He said calmly, and organized a small pile of papers in his hands.

"What is it now, Kakashi-sensei? More field practice? Can I beat the shit out of Sasuke? Or a mission! Oh, I bet it's a mission! What do we have to do? Transporting confidential scrolls? Escorting an exotic princess? Assassinating an 'S' ranked criminal? Capturing invading ninja?" Naruto burst into his usual questionnaire, a fox grin plastered on his face. Sakura sighed.

'_At least that's normal.'_

"I'm afraid not. Far from it actually. Here I have the forms for the Chuunin Exams." Kakashi stated boredly, not at all fazed by the outburst. By now, that was expected.

"The Chuunin Exams?" the trio echoed in unison.

"Kami, you don't know what I'm talking about? The Chuunin Exams are the yearly exams all genins take. I've taken the liberty of approving you three. If you pass these exams, you will get your badge as a Chuunin. Here are the entry forms, bring them with you to the academy three days from now. That is all." He explained, handing Naruto the small pile of papers, and disappearing just as suddenly as his entrance. (LB: Because we all know he has a date with Iruka.)

"Wow, I can't believe we're going to become Chuunin!" Naruto gave a squee, hopping up and down excitedly.

"Don't get so cocky, Naruto." Sakura scolded him, grabbing two of the forms in his hand, and handing one to Sasuke. But who was she kidding? Cocky was Naruto's middle name. Well, almost. She didn't even know Naruto's middle name, but that obviously isn't it.

"Well, it's getting kind of late, my parents will be expecting me home soon…hey! Sasuke! Want to watch the sunset with me by the bridge?" Sakura crooned to Sasuke. Sasuke almost smirked, because Naruto was silently retching behind her back.

"No." he refused, then slowly stalked his way to his own manor. Sakura whirled around on Naruto, who she was sure was doing something stupid while her head was turned. Naruto immediately stopped his mock of the kunoichi, and shrugged. Sakura sighed, then shook her head silently.

"…Bye Naruto." She waved half-heartedly, also starting to leave.

"Hey! Don't I get an invite?" he whined. Truthfully, he couldn't care less, but if he didn't say something, Sakura would think something was up.

"Baka." Was all the reply he got.

* * *

(Day One)

The screeching alarm clock startled the blonde awake, and out of bed. He looked around for a second, slightly disappointed that he hadn't woken up in Sasuke's bed again. He laid backwards slowly, closing his eyes. He took a deep breath, trying to remember the sweet scent of Sasuke's sheets, and how soft and smooth they felt. And how Sasuke got a nosebleed by seeing-

'_Naruto, you perv.'_ He snickered. He wasn't supposed to be thinking about that, but it still set off a little spark of hope that maybe, just maybe, the raven-haired nin liked him back.

"Of course not, he's an _Uchiha._" Naruto jumped out of bed, giggling at his own joke. He hopped around his bedroom, tracking down his brush. He was going to attempt to tame his mane he called hair today. Especially since the Zabuza chase, his hair had grown a bit. It was no longer a spiky mass, but it was longer, drooping over to the level of his cheekbones. He had grown slightly, maybe an inch, and he had earned a toned body, losing his baby fat rapidly. But nothing was more surprising than the sudden growth in his…well…you get what I'm saying. Naruto had read about this in a scroll accidentally, he thought it was called pip…pup…pu…pyu? Ah whatever, he just knew.

Now that he thought about it, Sasuke had looked taller, and his voice was a small tone lower, but it was hard to tell, seeing as how he hardly DID talk. Sakura had grown too. He didn't know anything about girl whatever-that-word-is, but she was definitely different. Also, for some reason, boys seemed to be ogling her more too, but he didn't get that either. But then again, he guessed he WAS gay, so that didn't bother him much.

Next topic: these exams. He didn't know how they were going to work, but something told him he needed to train. And he could think of only one person he wanted to train with…

* * *

"Sasuke! Sasuke-teme, open up!" he growled loudly, banging on the door outrageously loud. He opened the door, glaring outwards. Needless to say, Sasuke was not a morning person. Naruto jumped slightly, but then raised an eyebrow.

"What bit you?"

"Tch. Unlike you, I'm not Mr. Happy-cheery-sunshine in the mornings, dobe."

"Oh yeah, right. So, I was thinking about those exam things, and I was wondering blah blah blah…"

Sasuke rubbed his throbbing temples. He had a migraine this morning, and the consistent yapping was only making it worse. Before Naruto could start reciting a novel, Sasuke clamped his hand over the vessel's mouth.

"And you want me to train with you."

"Mmmfnmfs!" Naruto protested. Sasuke rolled his eyes, and took his hand off the boy's face.

"Yes!" he shouted, once his mouth was free of restraints. Sasuke winced, then spoke,

"Fine. Meet me at the edge of the forest around the back of The Estates in one hour. Until then, leave me alone." Sasuke growled, slamming the door in the dobe's face before he started cheering.

The raven-haired nin growled once he had reached the sanctity of his room, falling down backwards on his bed. When he made that dobe his, he was going to get him a muzzle.

**TBC**

* * *

**LB:** Yes, I know what puberty is, and I know how to spell it. The song typed in random sections was Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge. It's a good song, and I suggest you get it. I have nothing else to say, and the cast is being relatively quiet lately. Ja Ne! 


	9. No More Fairy Tales

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Disclaimer:** Mwah, I'm afraid I still don't own Naruto. Plan A failed. The song doesn't belong to me either.

**Warning:** YAOI! …Beware…

**A/N:** Ahh, slumber parties. Good times. We were "cosplaying" as random characters from Naruto from what we had in our friend's closet, and I got to be Naruto-kun. (Lucky me) Needless to say, I was later claimed, captured, and raped by my friend who was Itachi. Kiba wasn't very happy about it. Obito was also being a serial gropist. Although I liked the leash. 

**Naruto:** Nani?

**LB: **Yes, you like leashes. Now quiet.

**A/N (2): **Yes, I'm leaving another note because of the long wait. Yay for summer! Now I can write and there will be nothing to stop me!

**Sasuke: **Oh dear god…

* * *

**Chapter Nine**

"No More Fairytales"

Naruto looked around, amazed. How big was this damn place anyways? After Sasuke had rudely shut him out of his house, Naruto had walk-skipped to his apartment, grinning the entire time. Then he gathered his weapons, drooling over some of the thoughts that he had. _He_ finally got to train with Sasuke-alone. He hadn't exactly seemed very willing this morning, but the flicker of hope in Naruto's head told him that if there wasn't anything between them, then he would have just gotten a rude slam in the face. He started sniggering.

'_I can't believe perfect Uchiha likes me!'_ the very thought gave him extreme butterflies in his stomach. Maybe, just maybe, he would get what he wanted today.

* * *

Sasuke leaned on a tree, tapping his foot in frustration. Would it kill the dobe to be on time for once? Just to answer his questions, he spotted a yellow blur running in his direction.

'_Does he learn from Kakashi-sensei or something?'_

The Uchiha watched the blur of Naruto run faster, not seeming to slow down. Suddenly his eyes widened when he realized the blonde was on a crash course straight towards…him! He looked around quickly, a deer-in-headlights expression on his face, and he was grimly expecting utter doom, as it was certain Naruto wasn't thinking of slowing down anytime soon. He simply pressed himself into the tree, closing his eyes.

He felt a 'whoosh' of air and he dared to crack one eye open. Less than an inch in front of him was the said blonde, who had halted on a dime.

"Kuso!" he cursed, letting out a sigh of air, and relaxing. He glared at Naruto, who was rolling down on the ground with laughter.

"Hilarious." He muttered, then dashing off into the forest behind him. Naruto pouted and sat up, and realizing that the Uchiha was already gone, stood up in a rush, chasing after him by the treetops.

The waiting game. When neither side goes for the offensive, and instead they both sit there, waiting, supposedly for the other one to attack. Mostly it's a test to see who is more impatient, thus the impatient person attacks first. Many fights start out by playing the waiting game. Sometimes the two sides will come to a standoff, which is basically the waiting game for a long period of time. Usually played until nightfall, or until one drops his or her guard.

Although, needless to say, the waiting game is extremely, extremely, boring. It's not much to read about either, so let's just both assume that both Naruto and Sasuke are very impatient, and for the sake of the readers' interest, I'll skip that part.

Naruto growled lowly. It had felt like he was sitting in the tree for hours, and no feeling or sight of Sasuke anywhere. Finally with a stroke of luck, he heard a slight rustle of the bushes below him. His muscles tensed, and a spiky head of black hair emerged silently, slinking and weaving through the trees, completely oblivious to the fox-nin above him.

With a grin of triumph, he flung a kunai at the Sasuke, squealing when it landed straight in the arm with a yelp from the blue-shirted nin. Suddenly, his grin was wiped off his face when the injured Uchiha disappeared in a poof of smoke.

"A doppelganger?" he blurted, snapping a small stick in his hand.

'_Oh shit.'_ He thought, covering his mouth quickly. Now the real Sasuke would know exactly where he was. Confirming him, he received a small, yet not soft, tap on the shoulder. He growled and turned around, tackling the raven-haired ninja to the ground.

Sasuke gasped in surprise, not expecting Naruto to pounce. He was wrestled to the ground, pinned down by his wrists by the growling fox-nin. He was baring his canines, locking his gaze with Sasuke's. The Uchiha, instead of being afraid, his heart was beating fifty miles per hours for other reasons. To quit before he started, he wrenched himself away from Naruto, getting back on his feet, and adopting a stance.

_My life is brilliant_

_My life is brilliant_

_My love is pure_

_I saw an angel_

_Of that I'm sure_

_She smiled at me on the subway_

_She was with another man_

_But I won't lose no sleep on that_

'_Cause I've got a plan_

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful, it's true_

_I saw your face in a crowded place_

_And I don't know what to do_

'_Cause I'll never be with you_

Naruto skidded to a halt and lunged at him, kunai at the ready. Sasuke neatly sidestepped the onslaught, watching with amusement as the dobe was unable to stop. The fox-nin overbalanced, landing face-first into the tree. He cried in surprise, as he was attacked by a barrage of apples disturbed from the branches. He popped his head out of the massive pile. Sasuke snorted. The only thing visible from the pile of fruit was Naruto's head, and one of his feet. Naruto pouted, until he felt a trickle of liquid fall down his forehead.

"SASUKE!" he yelled, spazzing from under the apples.

"Yes, I know you're covered in fruit, dobe."

"No, Sasuke! I'm bleeding, teme!"

Naruto squirmed to free himself from the red prison, but to no avail. Sasuke smirked and stepped towards the blonde head, wiping off the liquid with a finger. To Naruto's shock and horror, Sasuke licked his fingers.

"EWW! SASUKE-TEME! WHAT ARE YOU! A VAMPIRE?"

Sasuke winced and covered an ear.

"Calm down, dobe. It's just apple juice." He stated calmly. Naruto looked stunned for a moment, then pouted.

"Stupid Sasuke, always having to be right." He grumbled, looking away. Then Sasuke did something completely unexpected. He knelt down by the mess of blonde hair and grabbed Naruto's chin. Naruto held his breath. Their faces were mere centimeters away.

"Um…Sasuke?"

"Shh."

Sasuke leaned in even further, drawing his tongue over the warm juice on Naruto's head. Naruto trembled over the unexpected touch. Suddenly the raven-haired boy stopped. Was this really what he wanted? He lusted over the dobe just about every day, but how did he know he wasn't just falling victim to those accursed pheromones? Everything was playing out like those fairy tales he always read when he was a kid. His fairy tale wasn't going to happen. Naruto didn't feel the way he did, it just seemed like it because Sasuke was the only person to ever show him affection. That was it. He wasn't going to let their lives be ruined. No more fairy tales.

Sasuke pulled away, standing up. His expression changed to cold anger, and Naruto flinched at the sudden behavior difference.

"Sasuke…?"

"No, Naruto. I know what you feel about me. I don't want it."

Naruto looked confused and shocked, and he stood up out of the apples, but he couldn't stop a tear from escaping his eyes.

"Sasuke…" was all he could choke out. Sasuke narrowed his eyes. He was sure the dobe was just playing his pheromones on him. He didn't want to be played.

"I said no! Naruto, I hate you." he stated coldly, his voice like ice. He turned around and walked away. As convincing as he made his excuse sound, he knew it wasn't true, but he couldn't bear to see Naruto's reaction. A poof of smoke and he vanished, leaving the blonde all alone again.

_Yeah, she caught my eye_

_As we walked on by_

_She could see from my face that I was_

_Flying high_

_And I don't think I'll see her again_

_But we shared a moment that will last 'till the end_

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful, it's true_

_I saw your face in a crowded place_

_And I don't know what to do_

'_Cause I'll never be with you_

Naruto whimpered, feeling dizzy and shell-shocked. What just happened? What did he do wrong? Was loving the Uchiha a sin? He felt like his heart was shattered into tiny pieces at that moment.

'_So much for training.'_ He mused sadly, trudging out of the stupid forest.

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful, it's true_

_There must be an angel with a smile on her face_

_When she thought up that I should be with you_

_But it's time to face the truth_

_I will never be with you_

* * *

(Day Two)

"Do you have any threes?"

"Go fish."

Team Ten was sitting in a booth at Ichiraku's, playing cards, as usual on a day when they didn't have training. Nara Shikamaru put his cards down, yawning.

"I'm out."

Ino was enraged.

"No way! How do you keep winning? No matter, I'll win the next game for sure!" she growled, already shuffling the cards.

"Not another game, Ino!" Chouji whined.

"I quit. Go fish is too troublesome." Shikamaru stated lazily. Suddenly something yellow caught his eye.

"Hey is that Naruto?"

Ino looked over there, and scoffed.

"Nah, it's too depressed and not annoying enough to be Naruto."

"The orange jumpsuit gives him away." Chouji stated. Shika nodded.

"He looks sad. I wonder why?"

Ino shrugged.

"He's probably out of money."

"Maybe you should go talk to him."

"Me? No way!" Shika sighed.

"I'll go talk to him."

The pony tailed nin walked over to Naruto. The mentioned ninja was slumped over the counter, toying with a stray ramen noodle with a single chopstick.

"Hey Naruto." Shika called, trying to be as cheerful as possible. For some odd reason, he felt attracted to the blonde. But he wasn't expecting the anything-but-happy reply of "Go away Shika." That he was treated with.

"Naruto, why are you sad?"

"None of your business."

Shika sighed. The blonde was really troublesome. All he could do was stand there awkwardly while Ayame came and took up his empty bowl.

"Does my favorite customer want any more?" she asked, grinning. '_Geez, is that person always so bright and troublesome?'_ Shika pondered. He watched as the dobe slowly shook his head no. He was about to reach for the bill but Shika stopped him by paying for it himself. Naruto eyed the brunette cautiously.

"Why did you do that?" he asked softly. Shika rubbed the back of his neck nervously. He wasn't used to the direct, serious, and otherwise non-troublesome Naruto that he was looking at now. Come to think of it, he had never seen Naruto being direct, serious, or non-troublesome. Something was wrong, Shika decided, and he needed to find out.

"You looked sad, so I'm trying to cheer you up." He shrugged. As good as an excuse as any.

Naruto analyzed the pony tailed nin for a second, then his eyes narrowed.

"Save your chivalry, Shika-teme." He growled. Shika flinched. He had never even thought Naruto was able to carry so much hatred. The boy came off as happy-go-lucky, innocent, carefree, and perpetually happy, if not always troublesome.

"Well, uh, I was wondering if you'd want to go cloud watching with me?" he asked, his last pathetic attempt at solving this mystery.

"No thanks." Naruto replied coldly, then he hopped off the stool and stalked outside. Shika strolled, dumbfounded, to the booth where his teammates sat, finding them as awed as he was.

* * *

Twenty-one hours.

It was twenty-one hours since he lied to Naruto. And he couldn't stop thinking about it. Sasuke hadn't been able to even sleep that night, just slip off into a fearful daze where he would dream about it. It was all very confusing to the Uchiha. If he really didn't love Naruto, then why did his heart ache so painfully? The dobe was an addiction, one that he wouldn't get over. He couldn't get over it, not even if he tried his hardest.

Sasuke sat on the floor of his room, holding a picture of Naruto in his hands. He was depressed, he was in pain, and it only made it worse to think that he brought it upon himself. He wiped his bloodshot eyes on his sleeve, shaking his head sadly.

"You have to stop, Sasuke." He told himself. "Your tears won't rewind anything."

He could use over one hundred methods to try and forget anything ever happened, but it was impossible. He wouldn't be able to ever see his dobe again, to see him hurt, because the raven-haired boy knew he was.

**TBC**

* * *

**LB: **Oh yeah! LB's back baby! (dances) Go me! Chapter 9 is done! Yes! (punches the air) Okay, enough celebrating! R&R guys, and thanks so much for being so patient with me! The song in the chapter was **"You're Beautiful" by James Blunt**. It's kind of a slow song, but I think it's really sweet. Okays. Ja ne! 


	10. Rewind

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Disclaimer:** No ownage for me. Neither do I own the song. Life is so sad!

**Warning:** If gay people are a sensitive subject for you, or if you're George Bush, then don't read any further.

**Naruto:** She's insane, isn't she?

**Kakashi: **Such is the life of a yaoi authoress.

**A/N:** Thanks to all of you for being so patient with me! I admit, I only have an excuse for some of the wait, but most of it is sadly, blamed on laziness. I'm crossing my fingers and hoping this makes up for the huge blank time. But thanks to boredom, it motivated me to get off my ass (or on my ass, whichever you prefer) and write this damn thing. (Pardon my foul mouth) Happy Reading!

**Cast:** Well it's about time! (Long exhales)

**LB: **And now for more tunes from my iPod! This chapter's song is **Your Woman **by **White Town**

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

"Rewind"

_Just tell me what you've got to say to me_

_I've been waiting for so long to hear the truth_

_It comes as no surprise at all you see_

_So cut the crap and tell me that we're through_

_Now I know your heart, I know your mind_

_You don't even know you're bein' unkind_

_So much for all your highbrow Marxist ways_

_Just use me up, and then you walk away_

_Oh, you can't play me that way_

_Well I guess what you say is true_

_I could never be the right kind of girl for you_

_I could never be your woman (4x)_

Naruto stalked down the street, ignoring the hateful glares casted his way, occasionally returning them with a cold stare of his own. One particular kid stared at him as he walked by, and in Naruto's opinion, he was being stared at in the wrong way. He glared back at the small child, in what he considered a perfected death glare. The child's eyes grew wide, and then he immediately ran off, crying for his mother. Naruto held a satisfied smirk on his face. Oh, he didn't sulk. Of course not.

'_Uzumaki Naruto doesn't cry. I'll show the bastard.'_ He mused, a plot for revenge forming in his mind.

* * *

He sniffed the air, finding nothing interesting of note. Who was it? Everyone's favorite canine-nin, of course! His white-furred companion whined, pawing the ground in annoyance. The boy snorted, curling his lips slightly. 

"I know its mating season, Akamaru! When do you get off?" he growled in frustration. Akamaru barked in reply.

"What do you mean I haven't made any effort in finding a mate? I've…thought about it…"he said sheepishly, attempting at a half-assed cover-up. In truth, Kiba had not thought of a mate, but in his mind, he could wait. He was only twelve, anyways.

"Arf!" (Translation: "Seriously now, do you at least have any ideas?")

"Actually, that blonde kid was pretty cute…Ah! What the hell am I thinking? He's a BOY, for Kami's sake!"(**1**)

Kiba scratched his head in annoyance, trying to get certain hentai images out of his head. Akamaru made a gesture of what looked like rolling his eyes, and shook his muzzle, plopping down on the ground.

"Arf!" ("I give up. You're hopeless.")

* * *

It was just then, that Naruto stalked past the training grounds, and turned his head to the melodic sounds of an Inuzuka and his dog having a verbal duel. (**LB**: Sarcasm implied here folks.) To any person sane of mind, they would probably shrug and continue walking, but Naruto was not currently in the category of 'sane of mind'. The gears in his head started turning, his master plan unfolding perfectly in his mind. 

"**_Oh no, kit. You're not thinking of-"_**

'_Oh yes, Kyuubi. I am.'_

"_**I want no part of this."**_

'_That's okay. I have everything I need.'_

Inside his thoughts, the blonde added a malicious chuckle. Which the fox demon had to admit, it even scared the crap out of her. (**2**)

_When I saw my best friend yesterday_

_She said she never liked you from the start_

_Well me, I wish that I could claim the same_

_But you always knew, you had my heart_

_And you're such a charming, handsome man_

_Now I think I finally understand_

_Is it in your genes? I don't know_

_But I'll soon find out, that's for sure_

_Why did you play me this way?_

_Well I guess what you say is true_

_I could never be the right kind of girl for you_

_I could never be your woman (4x)_

Naruto strode slowly and confidently up to the canine-nin, who was occupied by his argument with an animal.

"Hello Dog-boy." Naruto smirked, narrowing his eyes slightly.

Kiba looked up, surprised, and it almost made him jump out of his jacket. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, sweatdropping.

"Oh, hey Naruto. Wha'tcha doing here?" He smiled.

"Oh, nothing. Just wondering if you'd like to train with me?" he proposed smoothly. Kiba narrowed his eyes, studying the blonde. Since when did Naruto act so smooth? He shuddered as it reminded him kind of like a certain Uchiha.

"Uhm…sure…"Kiba agreed reluctantly, suspecting a plot. Little did he know what the hell he was getting himself into.

* * *

Sasuke sighed, tossing the scroll he was studying behind him. He collapsed backwards, sighing. 

'_Oh come on! I can't even study for the Chuunin Exams!'_ his mind agonized. All he could think about was you-know-who.

"Ah, screw it." He growled, standing up. He was going to apologize to the blonde even if it killed him.

* * *

"Art of the doppelganger!" (**3**) Naruto cried, surrounding the dog-nin. Kiba growled ferally, baring his pointed canines. 

"Art of the man-beast! Down on all fours technique!" Kiba responded, charging at the nearest clone. Akamaru-Kiba hopped off his back, taking down a few Narutos with him. The fallen clones disappeared into thin air, leaving only two left.

'_That must mean one of them is the real Naruto…This will be easy.'_ He strategized (**LB:**I don't even think that's a word.) quickly, nodding at the Akamaru-Kiba. They both rushed at a separate Narutos, simultaneously knocking them down almost effortlessly.

"Ha! That was too easy, Naruto!" Kiba cheered, grinning widely. But the feeling of victory soon faded, along with the smile on his face, when both knocked out Narutos disappeared in unison, sending up a large purple cloud into the air.

'_So both doppelgangers were fake, huh? Well, then that means-'_ Kiba's musing was interrupted by something cold and sharp against his skin. One tan hand held him by his abdomen, while the other held a kunai at his throat, dangerously close to piercing the skin.

Kiba stiffened suddenly, but soon relaxed when he realized it was only Naruto.

"Well, I guess you beat me, Naruto. I have to say, you're smarter than you look." He smiled good-naturedly, trying to un-clasp the hand from his stomach. To his shock the hand gripped tighter, and the kunai pressed harder against his neck, piercing the skin slightly. Kiba winced as a small trickle of blood ran down his shoulder. Naruto wasn't kidding. He smirked in is own devilish fashion.

"Listen, dog-boy. You make any sound or movement, and I _will_ kill you." He snarled, feeling Kiba gulp. Then the insane blonde glared at Akamaru, who whined.

"And you. You attract attention, and your friend can kiss his sexy ass goodbye." Akamaru shot Naruto a quizzical look, but he complied, covering his muzzle with his paws.

Kiba raised an eyebrow. _'Sexy ass?'_

'_Well, Kiba, you wanted the blonde.'_ He sighed inwardly at the irony. Before his mind could think any further, Naruto crushed his lips against the brunette's aggressively, growling into the kiss. Kiba reacted with a sharp intake of air, hands reaching desperately for something to hold onto. Like they had minds of their own, they decided on Naruto's waist.

_Well I guess what they say is true_

_I could never spend my life with a man like you_

_I could never be your woman_

Naruto's pent-up desire reached a fever pitch as he nibbled Kiba's lower lip. The dog-nin's lips opened slightly in surprise, and the blonde wasted no time in invading the other boy's mouth, tasting him for all he was worth. Trembling legs finally buckled, leaving the two to collapse on the ground. Naruto broke the mouth raping only momentarily to regain his breath, and then dove back in.

Tanned hands buried themselves in brown tangles of hair, while tongues played together in ecstasy. Muffled moans filled the ears of passerby's within a quarter-mile radius, warning them to stay away. A certain white-haired dog tried to keep silent, but the images of his master being molested (by a guy, no less) was a bit too much for the poor canine's mind to take. He buried his head in a bush and whined, but thank god that the vulpine-nin was too caught up in the fervor to think of anything but Kiba.

* * *

Sasuke's limbs were numb, and all other sound was blocked out. His body was in shock while watching his Naruto make out with Kiba. The raven-haired boy lost all intelligent thoughts, his entire being feeling dizzy, nauseous, enraged, and mortified all at the same time. Soon after giving up studying at his house, he traced Naruto's chakra to the training grounds, from where he hopped in a tree stealthily, since he didn't feel like jumping in the middle of a ninja fight. Although he wasn't expecting a simple spar to escalate into this all-out frenzy, which leads us up to this moment. 

'_Naruto…Kiba…kissing…My Naruto and that Kiba are making out!'_ his mind slowly strung a thought together, although deep inside of him, he was deeply confused.

This was enough. He had to stop this. NOW.

* * *

Kiba's hands roamed over Naruto's body, sometimes delving in his pants teasingly. Naruto hissed into Kiba's lips, screwing his eyes shut in pleasure. He bucked into the dog-nin's groin shamelessly, moaning when he realized how good that felt. 

Before he could feel any more, rough hands gripped the blonde's shoulders and ripped him off Kiba. Naruto grunted in anger, for being interrupted. A loud protest was about to fly out of his mouth when his mind registered what the hell was going on. (**LB:** Nya, you didn't think I was going to turn this into a NaruKiba fic, did you?)

He was sprawled out on the ground a few feet from his original position, propped up by a tree trunk. And he was staring up at the unmistakable crimson hue of the Sharingan. A very infuriated Sharingan. It also seemed like Kiba wasn't very pleased either.

"Sasuke! What the hell was that for!" he snapped bitterly, but was silenced quickly with a glare from the Uchiha.

"Kiba." He spoke softly, but threatening. "If you want to keep your dick, then I suggest you and your scrawny mutt to leave now before I get really pissed off. And if you breathe a word of this to anybody, then you can be damn sure I keep my promise."

Kiba's eyes widened in fear. Two death threats in one day seemed like a little much, so he grabbed Akamaru by the scruff of his neck and made a break for it.

"And you." He snarled turning to Naruto. Swiftly he grabbed the white collar, pulling the dobe up so that they were face to face. His eyes bored holes into Naruto's, not missing the fact that they weren't bright and soft as usual. Those eyes, like deep pools of blue, which emanated happiness, boundless energy, determination, courage, bravery, and child-like wonder. Although to his disappointment, at this moment they did none of the above. They were shallow, hard, and dull, and glinted like steel. Sasuke's own eyes fought their best to hold back tears. Besides, Uchiha's didn't cry. They just didn't.

"You betrayed me." He hissed, bringing his face in closer to Naruto's for emphasis. Naruto's expression saddened for a moment, but instantly hardened once more, as anger boiled over inside of him.

"Betrayed you?" he snarled. "Betrayed you? If I do recall, Uchiha, yesterday, you betrayed me."

"So you used Kiba as an outlet?"

"Well then, I guess that makes us even." Naruto snapped, shaking himself free of the fuming Sasuke's grasp, and folding his arms resolutely.

"I've enjoyed our little chat, Uchiha, but the Chuunin Exams are tomorrow and I'd like to study." He dismissed the other boy coldly, turning and starting off.

Before he could go anywhere, however, the Uchiha-nin grabbed Naruto's shoulders and turned him around to face him again.

"What the hell are you talking about, 'making us even'?"

"I saw the looks you gave the Hyuuga boy!"

Sasuke stepped backwards, his brain reminding him how ridiculous Naruto could get at times. He glared daggers back at the dobe, although now more exasperated then angry.

"You mean these looks?"

Naruto paused, as if trying to think of a retaliation, but before he could speak, Sasuke grabbed him and kissed him hard, pulling him closer to his body. Naruto tensed up like a board, but within a second he melted in the Uchiha's arms, like a rag doll. Sasuke broke the kiss, whispering into Naruto's ear,

"Don't you ever do that again."

Unexpected, Naruto broke down in the pale grasp, burying his head in Sasuke's shoulder.

"Sasuke! I-I didn't mean…I mean, I d-didn't want…"

"Shh, Naruto. It's okay." Sasuke soothed his blonde, tracing comforting circles on Naruto's back. Naruto finally relaxed, letting out a long shuddering sigh. He looked up at the other boy, sniffing softly.

"Sasuke?" he whispered softly, eyes now back to their deep sapphire color.

"Yes Naruto-kun?" Sasuke smiled faintly, wiping the blonde's tears with a finger.

"I want to rewind."

"Rewind what?"

"Everything."

The two boys stared into each other's eyes for a long moment, and fell into each other's arms, worn out with the events of the past three days.

Little known to them, they weren't alone. Another Shinobi was there, and he was already developing dirty thoughts about a certain blonde.

* * *

(Exam Day)

Naruto walked up to the school building, grinning expectantly. He was prepared for anything they were going to throw at him. Hokages had to always be prepared. He let out an excited snigger, throwing his hands back behind his head.

Crash!

In his excitement, the blonde forgot to look where he was going, and inevitably ran into something. Or someone. Naruto looked up at the dark boy looming over him.

"Watch where you're going." The boy said simply, voice devoid of all emotion.

"Holy crap! I'm sorry I-Hey, you're from the sand village!"

"I am."

Naruto smiled again, offering a hand to the boy.

"My name is Uzumaki Naruto! I'm the future Hokage! Believe it!"

The other boy was a bit taken back by Naruto's enthusiasm, but nonetheless he pulled the dobe up off the ground, staring hard at his face.

"Hello Naruto. They call me Gaara."

**TBC**

* * *

**(1)** **-**Remember the whole pheromone thing from chapter four or so? 

**(2) **-I made Kyuubi a female in this fic. Besides, why would a male fox give off uke pheromones?

**(3) **-Jutsu means 'art' in English, so when they say " no Jutsu" it's translated into "Art of the ". I like putting the English version of attacks, just so I don't butcher the Japanese language.

**LB:** (victory dance) Hey look! We got out of the angst section! And I wrote myself out of the hole I wrote myself into!

In other news, I got a complaint the other day that I focus too much on Naruto and Sasuke and not enough with Kakashi and Iruka (or even Neji). I apologize dearly to all of you, but I just couldn't think of anything for them to do! Don't worry, Kakashi and Iruka **will** resurface in the next chapter, and so will Neji. Don't count me out yet! I'm not done! Anyways, just a reminder, the song for this lovely chapter is **Your Woman **by **White Town**. See you next chapter! Ja ne!


	11. Hell Hath No Fury Like a Dolphin Scorned

Curiosity Killed the Cat

By LB

**Disclaimer:** As long as my kitty is orange, LB does not own Naruto. 

**Warning:** Who actually reads these? Oh well, if you don't like yaoi, don't read this story.

**A/N:** (Poof) I have returned! And brought to you this lovely chapter! (Woah, we're actually on chapter 11?) In other news, now I'm going to reply with a very thought-out critique I got from Lalalala.

Lalalala: um okay I'm a little confused here... so Naruto-sama was raped by neji-dono? Why exactly? He (neji-dono) didn't seem like the type to just up and rape someone unless of course you're planning to reveal on an upcoming chapter that neji-dono's suffering from a mental disease that causes its victim to just well, up and rape someone... er correct? I'm sorry it just didn't seem like a good enough justification that neji-dono's insanely in-love with Naruto-sama, it just doesn't happen right? And well speaking of Naruto-sama he WAS raped yes? Um, forgive me if i'm wrong but a rape-victim doesn't just bounce back into recovery after a good night's sleep... even if said victim is Naruto-sama or rather especially if it's Naruto-sama since we all know that he's got enough issues to sort out for himself without dealing with the consequences and mental scarring of being raped by a not-so-close-but-still-trusted-enough-comrade... so er, what gives? I didn't happen to miss somewhere in earlier chapters that Naruto-sama has selective amnesia did I? So why is being raped not a bigger deal for Naruto-sama in this fic? I'm just very puzzled

Thank you for bringing this to my attention. It's true, you don't just forget about something like that in a night. But still keep in mind; Naruto is extremely good at holding a mask. I will try to keep these things in mind while I'm writing. Now on the other issue. Neji really didn't just up and rape Naruto; it was mostly the influence of pheromones. Those are extremely powerful hormones, if you didn't know. When Naruto leaks a pheromone, it's basically an invisible scent that is supposed to tell other animals something. In the wild, a female leaks out pheromones during the spring, telling other animals she is ready to mate. It attracts other would-be male suitors out, to try to court her. Since Kyuubi is a female, and CKtC is set in the spring, in essence, Naruto is like the female animal in this case. Neji raped Naruto in order to put his claim on Naruto, but since there is no mutual attraction, Naruto is still free and leaking pheromones. So we'll be seeing more jealousy and fighting between the Naruto guys throughout these upcoming chapters. I hope this has cleared it up for many of you readers out there.

**LB:** I would now like to apologize for the storyline. I'm screwing everything up, I know.

* * *

**Chapter 11**

"Hell Hath No Fury like a Dolphin Scorned"

Or

"The Less-than Glamorous Return of Neji"

It was a dark and stormy night. Well, actually, it was mid-afternoon in broad daylight. But it sure as hell felt dark and stormy to a certain Hatake Kakashi. In other words, he felt like shit. Needless to say, he wasn't a morning person. It was one of those smile-at-me-and-I'll-murder-you days. People seemed to notice too, because wherever he went, there was always a path cleared for him. People were just psychic sometimes. It went on this way until his eye spotted an oh-so-familiar door. Oh how Kakashi liked that door. He took a sidelong glance at the area, and then jumped unto the second floor of the apartment complex, furtively crawling into the open window. Didn't he learn not to leave the window open?

The jounin sniffed appreciatively as a delicious smell leaked from the apartment's kitchen. He peeked around the corner to spy on the brown ponytail bobbing as the figure sliced a carrot into thin pieces with a large kitchen knife.

"Iru-chan!" The masked man greeted, stepping around the corner. The brunette tensed immediately, all motion stopping.

"Kakashi." He replied stonily. Kakashi cocked his head; something was wrong with his cute little dolphin, and it was up to him to figure it out.

"Maa, what's wrong Iru-chan?" he asked. A vein bulged in Iruka's forehead, as he drove the knife into the cutting board sharply. Kakashi flinched. Obviously he had struck a nerve. He was filled with the overwhelming urge to hug his koi, but something seemed like it was a bad idea. Maybe it was because the certain koi was holding a butcher knife?

"What's wrong?" he echoed, ice dripping off his words. He whirled around, a wide grin plastered on his face. Kakashi took a step backwards. The chakra in the room was filled with the intent of murder.

"Oh nothing's wrong, Kakashi-_chan_." He continued, tugging the knife out of the cutting board, and stepping towards the masked man.

"Except maybe if you count suddenly turning on me, humiliating me in public, and having no worries about my students!" he shrieked, taking a dash towards the cowering man, large knife at the ready. Kakashi rolled out of the way just in time, as his lover stabbed into the wall. The silver-haired man got back on his feet just in time.

"Iruka, they'll be fine! Honest!" Kakashi stuttered, relaxing slightly as he watched Iruka try (and fail) to tug the knife out of the wall. The chuunin gave up on the knife, and then grabbed a frying pan. Kakashi's eye widened and his jounin instincts immediately told him to "Get the fuck away." And he did. He scrambled towards the door, hands fiddling with the doorknob.

"Get out!" a yell came from behind him. The jounin closed the door behind him just in time to hear a clattering of iron against wood. The man sunk against the door, sighing deeply. Well, he was in deep shit.

* * *

Speaking of in deep shit, Naruto wasn't faring too well either. Let's see, he's in the middle of a test. A written test. Is Naruto good at written tests? No. Does he want to take the test? No. Does he have a clue what the test is talking about? Wait for it…no. Oh yeah, and apparently if he wants a shot for him and his team to make it to being chuunin, he's got to pass this test. Oh yes, Naruto was screwed.

'_Okay Kyuubi, its pop quiz time. If one ninja is in the Village of the Mist, and the other is in the Village of the Sand, and they're going opposite directions at 3 miles per hour, what will they have for lunch?'_(LB: Hah, that question makes me laugh)

"**One does not learn if they do not figure it out."**

'_Why do you have to be so goddamn cryptic? If I wanted an answer from Confucius, I'd consult a fortune cookie.'_

Kyuubi didn't respond. But then again, Naruto didn't expect her to. If she did, it would probably be something to the effect of "If a tree falls in the forest, and no one's around to hear it, etc."

Sakura grinned. This was easy! _'What would they have for lunch? A ramen sandwich with pickles. Question 2. What is the last digit of pi? Q. Question 3. What color underwear am I wearing? Um… Blue?'_

Sasuke grimaced. He just stared at Question 4: What is the meaning of life? How the hell was he supposed to know? He used the Sharingan to spy on the person in front of him. He copied the person, scribbling down the answer. Turning off his Sharingan, he looked down at his sheet at the answer he got. _'The meaning of life is 42?'_ (LB: Guess what movie that's from?)

Neji thought long and hard about Question 3. _'Since they don't tell me who 'I' is, then I will have to see the majority of the colors of underwear people are wearing!'_ he concluded. He turned on his Byakugan, scanning the room. _'Red, white, purple, rainbow, white, black…is that a thong?'_ Neji shook his head to clear that image. He passed over Naruto's ass and smirked, a bit of drool forming at the corner of his lips. Quickly regaining his composure, he looked at Lee. Big mistake. It took a few seconds to register that Lee was not wearing underwear. Neji smacked his head on the table and cried out with agony. He was positive that image would stick in his head for years to come. A couple of people looked oddly at him, but ignored it.

Kankuro raised his hand.

"I have to go to the bathroom." He declared, a proctor following him out the door. Once the puppeteer was in the bathroom, he turned on the proctor.

"Okay Karasu. Who is 'I' and what color is his underwear?" he demanded. A piece of clay chipped off of the proctor's face, revealing it to be a puppet.

"It is talking about Kotetsu. He is wearing a leather thong." The "proctor" recited in monotone. Kankuro looked a bit taken aback, but wrote it down nonetheless.

The person who sat in front of Naruto leaned over his desk, eyeing the person in front of _him_. He reached for the edge of the unsuspecting girl's pants, to spy on her underwear slyly.

"Naruto-kun, you can cheat off of me if you want." Hinata offered, smiling and blushing furiously. Naruto's eyes widened. He couldn't believe what he was hearing! He took a gulp, glancing over towards the paper, when a kunai comes hurtling by his nose. He spazzed, pulling back immediately, but slightly more relieved when it planted into the desk of the boy in front of him.

"That's three strikes. You're out." The proctor growled out from the back of the room. Naruto was sweating like hell. _Ohmigawsh, that like, could have been me...Wait, since when do I talk like that? Do you have anything to with this Kyuubi?_

"**I have no idea what you're talking about."**

Gaara watched the blonde from the back, licking his lips. That little Kitsune smelled and looked especially fuckable. _Oh wait, I have a test. Damn._ He placed two fingers over his eye, concentrating the sand.

"Third eye!" he hissed under is breath, and an eye made of sand popped in his hand. He got a sand particle in the neighboring shinobi's eye.

"Shit!" he cursed, pawing at his eyes. The sand Nin took his opportunity to see the answers with the third eye, writing it down on his paper.

Ino made hand signs, and her head collapsed on the desk. She got inside Sakura, and scanned the paper hurriedly. But she looked up, when a jolt of something unrecognizable passed through her body. _'Wow. I just got the feeling that everybody hates me.'_ Ino thought, pulling a face. (**LB:** Sorry, but I just loath Sakura.)

Kiba rested his head in his head, staring at the blonde object of his affection in the row in front of him. He spaced out, drool leaking from his mouth. Oh how he wanted to feel that tight ass of his again. It was only yesterday, but the dog-nin could smell the blonde from all the way where he was, and he smelled delicious. Oh the perks of having a hypersensitive nose.

Shino tried to stay focused by the test, but his gaze kept wandering over to the orange-clad ninja. The bugs inside of him wouldn't leave him alone about it either. They squirmed restlessly; eager to be let out and taste whatever they found that smelled so good. Thank god that the insect-nin wore a high collar and eyeglasses, because his gaze on the blonde would have been extremely noticeable. He licked his lips unconsciously. He finally gave in to his bloodline limit's desires, letting out but a single bug to fly where he wanted.

Shikamaru sighed, trying his best to fall asleep. He had finished his test within a few minutes of when he got it. He would have gone to sleep; however, a certain boy in front of him was giving him an extremely troublesome problem. It confounded him why, and the lazy ninja just simply didn't get confused by anything. It was agonizingly troublesome.

Sasuke seethed with anger on the inside. The dobe may have been oblivious to everything, but the raven-haired boy could feel all the gazes on his property. Yes, Naruto was his property. He would have to murder whoever touched his dobe.

Naruto winced, slapping a bug that bit his neck. He watched it fall to the ground in morbid satisfaction, and then returned to panicking over the test. He sighed, resting his head on the desk in frustration. He hoped that Kakashi was having as much fun as he was.

* * *

It turns out that Kakashi was having just about the same amount of fun as Naruto. Apparently Iruka had locked all of his doors and windows with a jutsu, so Kakashi had no way of sneaking in. He had tried using the "squish against the glass and make puppy-dog eyes" trick. Iruka just closed the curtains. He had tried using the "Someone save me I'm dying!" trick. Iruka turned up the stereo. Hell, he had even tried just going up and knocking on the door politely trick. He was ignored.

It's times like these when Kakashi resorted to the big guns. He made a series of complicated hand signs, and a poof of smoke later, what used to be the masked man was naught but a small, gray, innocent looking kitten. He had even changed his eye colors to both eyes being brown, making it a lot less obvious. Kitten Kakashi pawed at the window, meowing mournfully. He was about to give up when the curtains opened, revealing a very angry looking chuunin, but the brunette visibly melted at the sight before him. He walked outside the door, and picked the kitten off of his windowsill, bringing it inside. Hook, line, and sinker.

Iruka sat down on his couch and cooed at the feline, who purred loudly and batted at his finger playfully. The chuunin chuckled, patting the cat before taking it to his bedroom. Kakashi was plopped on his bed, while Iruka grabbed a towel. The tan ninja stripped himself in front of the Kakashi-kitten, oblivious. If it was possible, the kitten would have had a massive nosebleed right there. Iruka sighed, walking into his bathroom. Curious, the feline followed him, meowing in question. But the odd thing was, Iruka had disappeared. He meowed again, stepping into the bathroom further and still seeing no one. Suddenly a pair of tan hands grabbed him from behind roughly, and the kitten was flung into the already full bathtub.

The jutsu was ruined by the water, and a poof later revealed a wet (and very displeased) Kakashi, sitting chest-deep in the water.

"You can't fool me, Kakashi. I know all of your tricks." Iruka laughed tauntingly, leaning on the doorframe. Kakashi's gaze turned downcast, and he pouted, before rising out of the water and glomping the towel-clad chuunin suddenly. Iruka turned nearly twenty different shades of red, being tackled down on his floor by a wet (and horny) Kakashi, while he was only wearing a towel.

"Am I forgiven yet?" Kakashi teased, breathing hotly into his koi's ear. Iruka's expression darkened.

"No."

Kakashi sighed, sitting down outside of his little dolphin's apartment yet again. He rubbed his forehead, wincing. He didn't even think Iruka had that good of an aim. Back to square one.

* * *

Naruto gaped at the freaky bald man in front of him, who was grinning sinisterly.

'_You have got to be fucking kidding me. That entire fucking test was for nothing!'_

"**It looks that way, kit."**

Suddenly a dark blur flew in from the window. Four kunai embedded themselves in the walls, blocking Ibiki from everyone's view. Everyone looked at the proctors for an explanation, but they were all just as confused as the genin. A huge banner unfurled, announcing "The Second Chuunin Exam". Everyone sweatdropped. A loud woman in a fishnet shirt and an overcoat appeared.

"None of you are in any position to celebrate." She shouted.

"I am the second chief examination officer, Mitarashi Anko! Let's go!" she continued. Everyone simply stared at her, and not a soul moved. Ibiki peered from behind the banner.

"Can't you sense the mood here? You're early." He growled at here. Anko ignored the comment, surveying the genin with disgust.

"Twenty-six teams? Ibiki, you went far too easy on them." She snapped back.

"This year, we have applicants of exceptional caliber. And besides, you're early."

The dark haired woman pouted, crossing her arms.

"Fine. Have it your way. Alright kiddoes! The second chuunin exam will be held tomorrow at dawn! Rest up, you'll need it." Anko announced, adding menace to the last sentence. She could feel a collective sigh of relief from just about everyone in the room.

* * *

'_Thank god! I really need that break.'_ Naruto folded his arms behind his head, walking haphazardly down the hallway, making his exit out the academy. Suddenly he was grabbed and pulled into the corner by rough hands. Naruto squeaked in fear, looking up at his captor.

"G-Gaara?" he whimpered, trying to struggle away. Gaara had the same look in his eyes as Neji when… well, you know. The redhead smirked before crushing his lips against the blonde's, restraining his wrists. Naruto tried to pull away, or break free, but his wrists were being held in a death lock above his head.

Naruto gasped when a hand cupped his crotch. The sand nin used the opportunity to thrust his tongue into the Naruto's mouth. Naruto protested, but his sound died before it could wind up his throat. Gaara broke apart from him for air, and busied himself with unzipping the blonde's pants.

"Gaaraaaa…nooo." Naruto cried softly, but was answered with a dark chuckle.

"It's okay, my little Naruto-kun. It'll only hurt for a bit." He whispered into the younger boy's ear. He nipped the ear gently, eliciting a small moan from his prize.

"Ahem. I do hope I'm not interrupting anything." Growled out a familiar voice. Naruto looked around the corner, and mentally jumped for joy. Interrupting Gaara's fun was an extremely pissed-off Uchiha Sasuke, Sharingan fully activated. Naruto broke from Gaara's grip while the sand nin wasn't paying attention, and hid behind the dark-haired boy. Gaara narrowed his eyes at the offender, curling his lip.

"It would be best not to try to take my uke." He snarled. Sasuke snorted.

"Ha, _your_ uke? Please." The raven-haired boy replied, walking out of the hallway, a smug fox-ninja tailing behind him.

Gaara: 0

Kiba: 0

Neji: 0

Sasuke: 1

Shino: 0

Shika: 0

**TBC**

* * *

**LB:** Well, that's it for Chapter 11! One last thing, **if anyone knows the movie where Sasuke's answer came from, tell me in your review**. I'll give you a little present. As always, review please! Ciao! 


	12. Letter of Resignation

Well, as you may well know, I haven't updated CKtC in over a year, and it has been declared 'On Hold' on my profile. As much as I regret this (especially due to all your loyal reviews) **I will no longer update this fanficition.**

That's it! I've received several flames and harsh criticism on this, and I agree sincerely to all of them. I've decided that there is nothing I can do to resurrect it, so low in hell that it is. No amount of begging will get me to continue it. I don't want to seem like a bitch, but that's what has to be done. All trace of plot and conflict has been shredded into pieces by me during the course of the story, and there's just nothing I can do to continue it. Hopefully you understand.

But fear not, my darling readers! I am still writing, and am working on chapter ones for several fics and oneshots. I will make it up to you, I swear.

That being said, I am looking for a beta, if not a couple. I have a few requirements, however. If you are interested, and want to know more, please, _please_, email me at my gmail, (located on my profile) asking whatever it is you want to know. ) I won't bite off your head, I'm actually very cuddly if you talk to me personally. So, email me quick! I'll be refreshing my inbox every few seconds waiting for you guys.

If you're strapped for a good read, please go read any/all of **Kanemoshi**'s work. I'm a beta for her, and she's an excellent writer. (More than excellent, actually. She rocks so hard OwO)

Once again, I apologize.

-The LB


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